Book 2
The Basketball Years
(1986-2001)
'They're playing basketball, we love that basketball.'
Kurtis Blow
Chapter 7
Work
In 1984 the most wonderful thing happened in Worthing. The Brighton Bears, a basketball team from our neighbouring big city was in financial troubles and suffering from a lack of support at home games held in the massive Brighton Centre. They decided to hold some home games at various smaller arenas in the south coast and when 400 people turned up at the Durrington Leisure centre to see what the fuss was about, the owners decided to move the franchise to 'sleepy' Worthing. They changed their name to the Worthing Bears and there followed more or less 15 years of top flight basketball right on my doorstep. For some reason they became popular and garnered weekly audiences of over one thousand people. I went along to watch the games with Mark and a few others and we were hooked. After a successful first two seasons an argument with sponsors Nissan saw the Bears fold, but they were reborn in the second division. We finished second and got to play Brixton in the play off finals at Wembley arena. I went up there with Jason, Andrew Rollinson, Mark and Ben to see a famous victory. We also got to see the first division finals. I was really into wearing sports gear then and spent a lot of the money I earned on very expensive Nike and Converse trainers.
Of course we were inspired to emulate the feats of some of our new American heroes, Alan Cunningham, Billy Hungrecker and Jerry Jenkins. We started hiring out the main hall at the sports centre, the same hall the Bears played on and gathered some friends together to play. This would carry on for the next seven or eight years. Some of the regulars who came were: Me, Mark, Rita, Annette, Saffron, Jason, Ben and his brother Dean, Neil Andrews, Julian Ellis, Gary Alford, Paul Limmer and later Andy Rollinson, who was Emma Atherton's boyfriend and a young kid who Mark was studying with called Steven Fraser.
June 1985 was a crazy year for me, at the tender age of 16, was the year I left full-time education. A journey that had begun eleven years ago had finally come to an end. My decision not to carry on to sixth form and university all but confounded my schoolteachers who said I was making a big mistake. I was in the top sets and all my peers automatically carried on to sixth form and university. You see in 1985 the Witnesses frowned on further education. They thought that the world was going to end very soon and everyone should be concentrating on spending as much time as possible preaching to others and helping them become a Witness too. At College or University there were 'bad associations' who might discourage your young mind to question your beliefs. This is where I saw my future. Only ten years later the Witnesses changed their minds on this, saying maybe it would be a good idea to get some job skills to support yourself, ten years too late for me! Incredible that at sixteen we were expected to make such misguided, important decisions about our future. My mother obviously supported me and my father offered no opposition.
We started to see much more of my nan, who responded to our new religion, which was nice, although my auntie Janet and her kids weren't too impressed and were really anti-Witness. Part of the problem of course was that as Jehovah's Witnesses we weren't allowed to celebrate Christmas, Easter or birthdays which made things very difficult with our family. My dad didn't seem too bothered, or at least he didn't voice his opinion or seem to worry about where his family were spending all their time.
My mum's side of the family weren't that impressed either that we'd become Jehovah's Witnesses, but they didn't really treat us any differently. We had many fiery discussions with them, but none of them ever showed any interest, that is except my nan. My mother started talking to her and she agreed to have a 'bible study' which I conducted. I realised that if I was helping someone else become a Witness then maybe I should get baptized too. As Witnesses, you were baptized as an ‘adult’. Although I’m not sure a 15/16-year old is really an adult! Before you could do this you had to go through a series of questions with three of the local elders. I did this with Stuart Blundell, Alan Dunford and Bob Tebbit. Bob's wife, Dorothy had recently died and he invited me round for a fish supper on three separate evenings. In the April I would, along with Stef get baptized at our 'circuit assembly' in Hove.
It was on the same day as my grandmother's 40th ruby wedding anniversary. They had a party at a local scout hut, I brought Stef along and Rita brought Annette. I got lots of cards and presents that day, the only one I kept was a mug from Annette, 35 years later I still have that mug!
The European cup that year was held at the Heysel stadium between Liverpool and Juventus, I of course wanted Juventus to win, but it was to be a memorable evening for all the wrong reasons. Thirty nine Juventus supporters were crushed to death and six hundred injured as they were crushed by the oncoming Liverpool supporters. I was watching the match at local elder, Geoff Blake's house in Dominion road. Unbelievably they played the match and Juventus won by a Michel Platini penalty, but the result was immaterial. English clubs were banned from playing in Europe for the next six years...
The summer convention changed locations and this year we went to Southampton to the old 'Dell' football ground. I took part in performing the 'drama' at that assembly, this was a play, where we had to dress up as bible characters and perform in front of 20,000 people. It was memorable also as there was a bomb scare and we were evacuated from the stadium, all 20,000 of us, it was terribly exciting!
Like many of the serious youngsters in our local congregation I decided I wanted to be a 'pioneer', meaning I would have to dedicate 22.5 hours a week to preaching from door to door. This meant I would have to find a part time job to support myself. Anyway I was happy enough, I had lots of friends, a great social life and no more studying at school. Before starting my first job there was time for one last family holiday. North Wales was the chosen destination. We packed up the Triumph car for one last time and made the 8-hour, 300-mile journey to Llanrwst in the very beautiful Conwy valley. We stayed in a lovely little stone cottage farmhouse with chickens running free in the garden. Surprisingly for England, the weather was sunny. I sat outside and sketched the wonderful scenery. Every day the were jet airplanes speeding through the valley on training sessions, but despite this it was a tranquil spot. We watched the historic 'Live Aid' concert on TV and were impressed with the performance by rock band, Queen. We visited Portmeirion, a Venetian style village that was the setting for probably the greatest British TV series ever, Patrick Mcgoohan's 'The Prisoner', an enchanting place. By chance we saw TV presenter, Chris Tarrant there. We drove to Conway castle and went down some slate mine and passed a cloud covered mount Snowdon. My mum wasn't that happy, but us kids had a great time.
Back in Worthing I started my 'pioneering' and looked for a part time job. It didn't seem to matter what job it was. I looked in the local paper and answered an ad for a general handyman at an old people's nursing home, it was called Abbey Rest home in Tennyson road. I got the job and would work there two days a week, as well as some other bank cleaning jobs which I kept on. Basically I would do various odd jobs there, gardening, painting, decorating and helping in the house. It was run by this middle aged divorced guy and his two sons. They were quite well off and very well spoken and the father used to frequently be away in Thailand, leaving the two sons to look after the place. The money wasn't that good, but then a 16-year-old couldn't really earn much anywhere.
Chapter 8
The Divorce
In September 1985 someone would come into the lives of our family and turn everything on its head. That someone was a certain Joe Mullen. He was in his early twenties and had just moved down to Worthing from Leeds in Yorkshire. He was a Witness, although unbeknown to us he had been 'reproved' for being involved with a married woman. Of course we only found out that when it was too late. He seemed like a fun guy. He was into football and befriended our family. He used to come over to our house and we would play cards and monopoly, sometimes until the early hours. On one occasion we decided to drink as many cups of tea using the same tea bag, it was all pretty innocent stuff. Unfortunately by June 1986 he had became rather 'too' friendly with my mum, you could say that this was the moment our childhood was over...
My mother had been going over to his flat and spending a lot of time with him. Apart from the physical attraction, he was good with the kids and gave her that excitement that she had been lacking for several years. They were 'reproved' and then 'disfellowshipped' by the local elders, which made things very public and extremely difficult for us. My father was obviously devastated, she moved out and he filed for divorce. Of course we were all devastated. I was 17, Rita 16, Carl 14 and Alan 12. Joe, who worked for Cantors, a furniture company, managed to get a transfer to Yeovil in Somerset and he and my mum, with Carl and Alan moved to Sherbourne in Dorset. Rita and me stayed with dad. The house in Highdown Avenue was put on the market and sold quickly. While this was all going on, Rita and I stayed with Pat and John Limmer. They lived in the very posh Aldsworth Avenue witth their two sons Michael and Paul. They were all witnesse except for Pat's husband John. It was very kind of Pat to allow us to get out of this very difficult situation if only for a couple of weeks. I was doing some gardening for a local 'sister' Lily Wake and remember roller skating from her house in Ferring to Pat's house and on to Abbey rest home. She had a rather pretty tennis loving granddaughter called Elaine Johnson.
It was all over very quickly and by the summer of 1986 my mother and father were divorced. Stef and I decided to go on another cycling holiday again to the west country, this time we were even more adventurous, planning to go as far as Exeter, 160 miles from Worthing, in one day! It was a monster trip and the first part went well. We got as far as Lyme Regis until Stef's knee gave out. I left him in a b&b and soldiered on reaching Exeter at ten pm at night, exhausted, but relieved. That day would go down in Lee Cooper folklore as 'the day I cycled 160 miles in one day'.
Stef took the train the following day and met up with me in Exeter. We had another very nice holiday visiting Paignton and a little harbour town in Dartmoor, where you had to take a ferry to reach and there was a firework display in the evening. We cycled back to Taunton to visit Bill and Vanessa again, before Stef took the train back to Worthing and I cycled the monster 130 miles back to Worthing on my own, stopping only once and doing the journey in a super quick time of eight hours. Stef and I spent a lot of time together, we went up to London on several occasions, we both bought suits in Carnaby street and visited Brixton, it was really cool hearing reggae booming out of sound systems in Electric Avenue.
Chapter 9
Canterbury Road
Life carried on. I kept busy with the pioneering and work. The money that mum and dad got from Highdown avenue was split. Dad used his half to put down as a deposit on a new house, while mum and Joe proceeded to buy furniture, a car, bicycles etc. and very soon their half of the money had been spent. Dad, Rita and I went to see some new houses, one in Twitten Way behind the Kingdom Hall and the other in Canterbury road near West Worthing station, the one we finally chose. It was quite a big three bedroom terraced house. The third bedroom was tiny, so I got to turn the lounge into my bedroom. I decorated it up, even painting the ceiling black! It had a small garden in the front and at the back. Next door lived a couple with a young daughter and the other side an older couple, they were all friendly enough.
Mum and Joe got married in Yeovil in March 1987, but as they were disfellowshipped Rita and I didn't go. Rita was actually never baptized as a Witness and in fact after she left school found it hard to keep down a job, so she went down to Yeovil to live with mum and Joe and the boys. Even though Joe had split our family up, he was fairly strict with the boys, getting them to help with chores around the house and he made Rita get a job.
The congregation in Worthing had divided into two, Durrington and Broadwater. The dividing line was Tarring road, which as Annette was in Adversane road and me in Canterbury road, meant we were in different congregations, as was Stef. At the beginning of 1987 I changed jobs. Local 'brother', Michael Limmer decided to move to Chichester and I took his job working in the fridge at Tesco in the new supermarket in Durrington. Probably one of the most humiliating jobs I have ever done, although I did occasionally get to serve cheese and hams on the provisions counter. I supplemented this with another tough job, working in another nursing home, but this time as a nurse, feeding and looking after the patients. Another local 'brother' David Harvey worked there and he got me a job working the night shift. I had to change old people's nappies and even had to lay out one woman who died! For an 18 year old it was a real eye opener to life. David was a singer, he formed a small band with Paul Cleary on guitar, David Lusted on drums and Michael Glover on Bass. They were actually quite good and recorded some songs, a few of which were even played on local radio station, Southern FM.
Mum had fallen pregnant and in the February was due to give birth. I finally went down to Yeovil to visit. I can still hear the screams today of my mum giving birth three floors up in the hospital, if you saw Cassandra you would understand why! (Sorry sis, couldn't resist that one! Got you back for Leeds united singing 'We are the Champions', well if your mother tells you something at six years old you believe her!) and so I had a new sister, Cassandra. She was a pretty, blue eyed blonde baby girl and of course we loved her...
I would visit them many times over the next few years. They were reinstated into the congregation and I would visit there too, the Witnesse there weren't as friendly as in Worthing and I usually visited to help them move or decorate. They soon moved from the very quaint Nether Compton in Sherbourne to a miserable town called Bishops Caundle and then back into Yeovil. Yeovil was like any other town in England, with the same old shops. I came to accept Joe as time went by, although it wasn't long before he was up to his old tricks, having an affair with another married woman at his work, mum freaked out, but soon forgave him.
In the spring Rita and me were driven by Jason Atherton in his first car a little old Toyota, to the Hammersmith for my first ever music concert in London. It was to see the Temptations. We left early, which was lucky as the car broke down on the way. We walked to a local town for help and made it up just in time. It was a fantastic experience, the band with Dennis Edwards back singing lead vocals and supported by British Saxophonist, Mike Stevens and the first of my many trips to the capital to see various music concerts.
A bright spot in 1987 was the famous summer 'boat trip' to the Norfolk broads. Our group of friends decided it would be fun to go up to the Broads and hire two boats. One for the boys and one for the girls. The boys were me, Stef, Mark, Ben, Jason, Les Vogel and the girls were Annette, Saffron, Emma, Claire Warden and Julie Atherton and a young couple, Melanie and David Lusted providing the 'adult' supervision. We planned it out meticulously. The main group went up by mini bus and my dad, who by now had bought himself a 'post break up' car, a white 5.3 Jaguar XJ-12 taking up the rest of us. The holiday got off to a disastrous start on the first day as the girls boat had a gas leak in the fridge and they all had to be rushed off to Norwich hospital. Jason had discovered them in the early morning passed out from the fumes and sent out the alarm. They were literally minutes away from death. Us boys visited them and fortunately they were only kept in overnight as a precaution. We decided to carry on with the holiday and had a great time sailing, mooring up, going for walks, playing rounders, having pub meals and generally causing mayhem on the water. It was the summer of Rick Astley's 'Never gonna give you up' and would kind of symbolize the end of our an era for me.
When I got back I decided to change jobs again and became a butcher, working for Ben's dad, Ian Lobb. He had owned a butchers shop in Ferring, but when his dad, also a butcher, retired, he took over his shop in Half Moon Lane. Paul Limmer married Ben's sister Carla that autumn and while they were away on honeymoon on October 16th the south coast of England suffered the worst storm in living memory. Paul's brother, Michael who was a delivery driver for Ian, called round for me (I had slept through the storm) and I helped him deliver meat to various restaurants in Sussex, witnessing the sheer carnage the storm had caused. The roof of Paul and Carla's flat above the butcher's had collapsed, ruining all their wedding presents and for the rest of the day I helped clear the debris. Years later and five children later Paul managed to burn their house down in Shelby road by leaving a candle on. Carla ran off with her fitness instructor and they got divorced, you could say they weren't the luckiest of couples!
Working at the butchers was tough. I had to start work at 6 am and work a twelve hour day. It was messy work for a trainee butcher, making pet mince, sausages and gutting ducks. Ian also kept his old shop in Ferring, which was a sleepy little town (famous years later for its well-known resident, Chelsea footballer, Frank Lampard!) open and I was transfered over there and kept the shop open by myself. Later Ian's busines went bankrupt as customers failed to settle their outstanding accounts. The family lost everything, including their huge house in Sandwich road, Their two Volvo cars and they moved into a council house in Goring and Ian became a window cleaner. It was a big fall from grace.
I went to 'pioneer school' in Brighton in the December for two weeks, which provided me with special training and was a good experience. Going door to door was tough as people rarely listened, if they opened the door at all, but as you went in pairs you did get the chance to chat with the person you were with.
Many families were very kind to me in the congregation after my mum left and became kind of 'surrogate parents'. Ian and his wife Cherie were very good to me and a couple I became particularly close to were Jim and Denise Wright. Jim had been to Oxford university and worked as a car salesman for British Leyland. He married Denise, who had been brought up as a Witness and Jim had converted only recently. He found his job too time consuming and decided to quit and start running his own business. His first venture was called 'Marine Lunch Club' as a kind of competition for 'dial-a-lunch', which was a lunch delivery service for Worthing's elderly population. Whereas 'dial-a-lunch' delivered cold meals in aluminium boxes that the customer then re-heated, he came up with the idea of putting the food on cardboard plates that 'runners' would carry in these huge blue polystyrene boxes, thereby the food would arrive at the pensioners doorstep steaming hot and ready to eat! Denise and her mum did the cooking and combinations of Jim, his elderly father-in-law, Pat, me, Jason and his mother Julie would do the delivering. It was a bit of a laugh running around Worthing with these silly boxes, but afterwards we all had a slap up roast diner and a laugh about the mornings funny stories about some of the blind, deaf, incontinent, drunk or senile people we had encountered!
I became good friends with Jim and Denise as well as closer to Jason and Julie. Rita had been good friends with Emma. Emma had a school friend called Saffron. Saffron became a Witness too and was all but outcast from her family, who thought she was wasting her life. Emma started dating a guy from Lewis, called Andrew Rollinson, he came from a large family with three brothers and three sisters. We spent a lot of fun times with Jason and Emma. We used to ring a telephone box across the road and hang up when someone went to answer. Jason began to like the same music as me and on one occasion when we were in Brighton we were looking in a record shop, I was picking out some 12" singles and the shopkeeper said, if I could pick out 100, he would sell them to me for £10, or 10p each, a feat I accomplished with ease!
Chapter 10
Mediterranean Cruise
In the spring of 1988 we all went on what for me was to be a holiday of a lifetime. A ten day Eastern Mediterranean cruise. Me, Julie, Jason, Emma, Andrew and his older sister Sue, Sue was a very quiet, shy girl, I'm not sure if she liked me or not, but I didn't fancy her. Still we all got on well and had a wonderful time. We flew to Athens and picked up our boat, the Betsy Ross at the port in Pireus. The boat had a Greek crew and we had full-board, the food was mainly Greek, which meant loads of black olives. The Athertons were really fussy eaters and so as well as eating all their olives I was to have a feast every time we went to dinner! There were lots of things to do on the boat, like deck games, a plunge pool, several discos, bars and restaurants. The weather was fantastic for the whole holiday, April proved the perfect time to go.
Our first stop was the island of Crete. We had booked excursions for every stop, so here we took the coach to the ancient city of Knossos. It was like a Greek equivalent to Pompeii with the ancient palace of the Minoans. It was extremely well preserved and I was in heaven! We saw the Minotaur's labrynth, walls frescoed with bulls and dolphins and what was thought to be the first theatre. It was a very hot day and an incredible experience for me wandering around amongst these ancient ruins.
From Crete we boarded the boat and sailed down to Egypt. Our destination was Cairo. We moored at Port Said and again got the coach down to Cairo on what appeared to be a dirt track! We stopped on the way to see the tomb of the unknown soldier, Nobel Peace Prize winner, President Anwar Sadat's monument to Arabs and Egyptians who died in the 1973 October war. When we arrived at Cairo there was a football match on and we saw thousands of soldiers walking to the stadium, it was a bustling city and the roads were lined with pyramid shaped bushes. Our next stop was at the famous museum where we got to see the treasures of Tutunkhamun, including the incredible gold and turquoise death mask. It was almost too much beauty to take in. From Cairo we made the short journey to see the Pyramids and Sphynx. I was speechless as we walked around this wonder of the world. People were trying to sell us stuff all the time and asking for money. We all went for rides on camels, which was a surreal experience and not as easy as it looks! While we were in Cairo we also visited the Mosque of Muhammed Ali and although it was fairly modern building only being built in 19th century, it was certainly very impressive for the architectural skill and all the alabaster inside. We finished on a hill overlooking the city and some magnificent views. This was a truly unforgettable day.
Back on the boat complete with fez, we headed up the Gaza strip toward Israel. The military boarded our vessel just off the coast to search our belongings and we were told we couldn't take any photos at the port, maybe it was some special Israeli welcome? We were scheduled to visit Bethlehem, but as the P.L.O. were stoning tourist coaches, that trip was cancelled. Instead we visited the children's Holocaust museum. There were a series of rooms with thousands of candles burning. Each candle symbolised one child that was killed in the Nazi holocaust during the second world war. It was a sobering experience to say the least.
From there we travelled on to David's city, Jerusalem, for a tour of the ancient city. We stopped on the mount of olives for a view of the city and even went inside the garden of Gethsemane, where Jesus was supposed to have prayed in the night before he died. In the old city of course there were many churches each one built on a special site. The Dome of the Rock being the most impressive, built on the temple mount with the striking gold domed roof. The church of the Holy Sepulchre, was impressive too, built on the supposed site of Jesus' execution, Golgotha and where his tomb was supposed to have been located. We were able to walk up to the Wailing wall, which was separated for men and women and observe the tiny rolled up prayers that had been pushed into the cracks and wandered through the ancient cobbled streets, it certainly was a moving experience.
Our next excursion took us to the lowest point on Earth, the rift valley. I can still remember my ears popping as the coach descended 1,369 feet. We went for a swim in the dead sea, which of course was full of salt. It was a surreal experience, swimming or rather floating in this strange atmosphere. It was very shallow and thick mud covered the sea bed.
Again we took the coach back to the port, bid our farewells to Israel and sailed on to our next destination, Turkey. We docked at the port in Kusadasi where we visited the markets and bought fake Lacoste jumpers and shirts. Some guy even offered to give my gleaming new white Converse trainers a shoe shine! We tried some excellent apple tea and bought some delicious Turkish delight. Our excursion in Turkey was to the ancient city of Ephesus, site of another incredibly well preserved ancient city. Now many miles from the coast, which at one time was much closer. Ephesus was fascinating. A wide marble covered street led up to the town. An enormous facade of the library was still intact and the very beautiful theatre in excellent condition. The public toilets were interesting. Seating about fifty people in a circle around a central fountain, with mosaics on the floor. While I was sitting on one of the loos I dropped my camera down the bowl and had to scramble down into the cistern and retrieve it, fortunately the toilets had dried up 2,000 years ago! The only disappointment was the one time wonder of the world, the temple of Diana. All that remained was one small pillar.
So on to our final destination, back where we had started in another giant of world history, Athens. Athens today is a sprawling metropolis, with most of the people of Greece living there. We passed by the main Omonia square and the impressive glass sheet sculpture of a running man. Our main port of call of course was the Acropolis. The Acropolis is essentially a large mound with some of the most incredible architecture ever created on top! The Parthenon being an obvious highlight. We entered through the Propylea, which is the monumental gateway and were transported back to the fifth century B.C. There were huge blocks just lying around everywhere, some with numbers on like they had been catalogued, but still awaiting some kind of restoration. The Erechtheion was cool, this was a smaller temple, the one with the columns in the shape of female figures or 'Caryatids'. apparently there was an extra figure removed by Lord Elgin, that Scottish nobleman and diplomat in 1800, the same guy who took most of the friezes from above the Parthenon. He was trying to restore the marbles and after finding some difficulties, bribed local authorities and carted the lot off to England to decorate his Scottish mansion. He later fell into debt and in 1816 the eighty cases of marbles were bought by the British government for £35,000. On the side of the Acropolis we looked down on the Herodes Atticus theatre, built in the second century B.C. Holding about 6,000 people, the stage and seating have been restored and in the summer is used for concerts and shows. The Parthenon is the acropolis' crowning glory and was enormous. Dedicated to the goddess and patron of Athens, Athena in the fifth century B.C. with its huge Doric columns is considered the most important surviving building of Classical Greece and you feel you are in the presence of something truly wondrous. One can only imagine what it would look like with the marble friezes that now lie in the British Museum.
And so this incredible journey came to an end. From Athens to Crete to Egypt to Israel to Turkey and back to Athens. The journey would only last ten days, but the memories would last a lifetime...
Of course going back to normal life wasn't easy after an experience like that. It's amazing that a lot of the daily drudge fades in the memory and it's those really special times that are clearest. I continued with my pioneering and butchering! That summer we went to our 'District Convention' in Southampton, but also to the Athletics stadium in Crystal Palace to work as night security guards. Jason took up his caravan which we slept in during the day. At night we would walk round with walkie talkies, protecting the stadium from potential intruders. It was great fun. There were about ten guys and we got some of the Athletics equipment out and had wheelchair races on the track! Before the Assembly we saw many Athletes training and on one occasion saw Javelin thrower Steve Backley filming a commercial where he threw the javelin over ten double decker busses. We saw Salley Gunnel too, training for the Seoul Olympics. We went up the next couple of years too and made some good friends there. We sometimes played huge football matches and during the day walked into Beckenham, Penge or London. There was the occasional party too. I usually found a sports or record shop and bought sports clothes, cassettes or records I couldn't find in Worthing. By then C.D.s were becoming popular and I was beginning my C.D. collection. I was also introduced to a local London radio station, Choice F.M. They were playing a new kind of Soul music called 'New Jack Swing' a really cool, funky kind of R'n B mixed with Hip-Hop. I bought albums by Teddy Riley, Keith Sweat, Intro and Men at Large. I saw reggae group, UB40 again, but this time at the Hammersmith in London and back in Worthing two old Soul groups, The Drifters and Stylistics. After one of the Assemblies in Crystal Palace we saw a classical concert with music by Tchaikovsky in the park.
Mum and Joe moved after the summer to Bishops Caundle and I went down to help them move and redecorate their new house. Cassandra was still a baby and they had bought a mini metro car which mum drove as Joe hadn't taken his test.
One special evening that Autumn was when I was round Stef's house and we were having dinner. We had Southern F.M. on in the background. I didn't usually listen to this radio station, but there was a cool black D.J. called Ambrose Harcourt. He would play smooth soul and he ran a competition where he would read out some lyrics and the first listener to ring in identifying the correct artist and title would win a prize. This particular evening it just happened to be the Luther Vandross track 'Any Love'. I recognized it immediately and quickly rang up. Amazingly I got straight through and Stef made a recording of me being interviewed! I won some 12" singles and that evening went down in Lee Cooper folklore...
1989 and I decided that being a butcher wasn't for me. I had a small accident while slicing a belly of pork and gashed my forearm. The blood hit the ceiling and I was rushed to the hospital where I received three stitches.
A local witness, Ward Caldwell had just moved back to Worthing and was starting up a decorating business. After doing a few jobs with him, he took on some bigger contracts and I was taken under the wing of a local elder, Paul Cleary. He taught me how to paint properly and hang wallpaper, two skills which would stand me in good stead in the future. We worked together on my projects along with some other guys such as Steve Morris, Les Vogel. We listened to the radio and Paul even let me play some of my music as we worked. They liked to have long lunch breaks and we would sometimes go and play football.
That spring the Athertons were planning another holiday and in the April we went on an Amalfi coast trip, by coach! The journey took 36 hours from Worthing to Naples. It was a nice chance to become reacquainted with some of my family that I hadn't seen for years. Of course my cousins, Antonio, Emelia and Franco were all married by now and had children. We stayed in a nice hotel near Sorrento, Piano di Sorrento it was called. My cousin Franco met up with us one of the days and took us to a cool beach where we swam, in April! The weather was gorgeous, it was like the weather you hoped for in England in the summer but never got... Franco took us for a pizza at a nearby restaurant we had already been to, they charged us much less with him and then on every subsequent visit charged us less too. Also I had been overcharged at the hotel for a local phone call and he sorted that out too. I had been given a taste of the infamous Italian 'rip off' tactics. On one of the other days the others went to Amalfi and I met up with my family. Auntie Anna and Uncle Mimi. Amelia and her husband Franco took me to sample some disgusting spring water at the local Terme in Castellamare. Anna had given Franco some money for me and when he saw me checking out a cool Juventus sports bag he bought ot for me. I aslo spotted an Italian national team tracksuit and football jersey which I bought too. We went on a day trip to Capri and Pompeii and even climbed up Mt. Vesuvius. We somehow managed to fit in a day trip to the eternal city, Rome, which was nice, but seemed a bit rushed.
In the summer I went up to Crystal Palace again with Jason and afterwards we went on a weeks cycling holiday to the Isle of Wight. We took the ferry from Portsmouth and stayed in a bed and breakfast in Ventnor. We had a good time visiting the famous landmarks, but the problem was Jason didn't want to eat. He would fill up on the breakfast, much like a squirrel and that would keep him going for the day. On one occasion I remember eating a pub dinner and he just sat there and watched me! It was a bit bizarre.
In the autumn mum and Joe had had enough of Bishop's Caundle and moved to the outskirts of Yeovil. This was much more convenient for them, but unfortunately also for Joe to have an affair with another married woman, work colleague, Doreen. I was staying up with them at the time and mum and Cassandra took refuge round local elder Alan Wyman, it was all rather messy.
On the 9th of November Germans from East and West breached the Berlin wall and celebrations began... the Berlin wall had fallen. The 1980's came to an end and it was the beginning of a new decade, the 1990's.
The 1990's or 'noughties' saw the end of the cold war which had begun after the second world war, as old communist regimes began to fall. The old soviet union was split up and the 'good Friday' agreement brought thirty years of violence in Ireland to an end. On the other side there were conflicts and genocide in Rwanda and Bosnia and tension between Israel and the Arab world were still high. The gulf war started after Sadam Hussein's Iraq invaded Kuwait. The 1993 World Trade centre bombing, the year after I visited New York brought a taste of things to come. Margaret Thatcher was finally forced out of government after her disastrous introduction of the 'Poll Tax' and her protégé, John Major would replace her and stand for a surprisingly long seven years until Tony Blair and his 'New Labour' ended eighteen years of Conservative rule. 1997 brought the death of one of its biggest icons, Princess Diana and a new word entered the English language, Paparazzi.
The 90's became the decade when the P.C. internet and mobile phone really took off. Dolly the sheep became the first cloned animal. Damien Hirst started putting animals in formaldahide and calling it Art, the new media, Grunge was the new music and fashion and Hip hop finally became mainstream. Towards the end of the decade Indie bands Blur and Oasis vied for supremecy in a kind of north/south divide, much like the east coast/west coast rap scene in America. Britpop was born with the Spice Girls and for a short while, 'new' labour leader conned us into thinking we were living in 'Cool Britannia'. The world was enraptured with Leonardo di Caprio and Kate Winslet in Titanic, dinosaurs came back into fashion thanks to Jurassic Park and lost it's heart to the loveable Forrest Gump. Independent films were very popular, such as Pulp Fiction and Danny Boyle's, Trainspotting. Radiohead were everyone's favourite 'alternative' band and there was a Disney revival, with the Lion King one of the highest grossing films of the 90's.
At the beginning of the 90's my cousins Frank and David had children, Frank had a boy, James and Linda and David had a boy and a girl, Adam and Katie. Fiorella and Michael also had a boy and a girl, Craig and Rachel. Rita and Michael had two girls, Natalie and then later Holly who together with my new sister Cassandra became the new wave of grandchildren.
In 1990 the decorating with Ward and co. was drying up and I made the dreaded decision to start a job that a lot of 'brothers' were taking up, Window Cleaning... It was Paul Limmer that got me started. He offered me a job and I worked for him two days a week. After the disastrous start to his marriage him and Carla had moved up to Reigate where he had started up his own window cleaning round. After the birth of their first child, Oliver they then moved back down to Worthing, where he built up more work. I would spend one day with him up in Reigate and another down in Worthing, in West Chiltington. He was very strict and worked very hard, long days. He encouraged me to start having driving lessons, which I did with local brother, Laurence Dunford and even said that I could drive his car. After only several lessons though he had a small crash, while showing off his superior driving skills and rather stupidly I stopped having lessons. Eventually working with Paul got a bit dispiriting though as he would leave me on my own for six hours or so while he went away and did other things. I would be taking home less than a quarter of what I was earning for him.
In June it was the World football cup and this year it was a bit special as it was being played in Italy. Many new stadiums had been built and the Italian and English national teams were the strongest they had been for eight years. England had Gazza, Lineker, Waddle, Beardsley, Pearce and Platt. Italy had Baggio, Vialli, Baresi and one-competition wonder, Toto Schillaci. It was a heartbreaking finals for me as England and Italy reached the semi-finals. It was 'the final that should have been', as both teams lost on penalties. England to Germany and Italy to Argentina. In fact the final was a boring 1-0 win for Germany with a penalty the only goal scored. Whereas the 3rd place play-off game was a great match that Italy eventually won 2-1, but had little significance.
That summer I also got to see my first live cricket match. England were playing India at the Oval and Graham Gooch was just coming off his famous 333 not out innings. Paul Limmer got me a ticket and we went up to London to watch a memorable day of the second test. I got to see a very classy 167 from David Gower and listen to the very funny Indian fans heckling Graham Gooch with memorable phrases such as "Graham Gooch, even my mother can play better than that!" which when done in an Indian accent was hilarious. In August I went with mum, Joe and Cassandra to the Cardiff assembly.
Chapter 11
Euroburn
In spring I had started planning with Stef what would be our epic swansong before he moved away from Worthing. We bought European train timetables and started pouring over large maps of Europe setting out our route through the old world continent. There was a special train ticket for the under 23 year olds. The Interail ticket which at that time cost about £150. I was 21 and he was 23, so we just qualified. We agreed we could afford to take three weeks out and started calling various family members, friends and friends of friends, so we would have somewhere to sleep at various points on the journey. The ticket covered such exotic countries such as Morrocco, Spain, Greece and Eastern Europe, but we settled on just seven countries, taking in about twenty cities, which in twenty one days was probably a bit too ambitious!
So the plans were made, the rucksacks packed, Stef's brother Marco and new Stef's 'new' friend, Wayne Blake took us to Dover where we caught the overnight ferry to Ostend.
We arrived in Belgium at some ungodly hour and took the train straight out of Ostend to the capital, Brussels. At this time of day the city was deserted and we wandered through wide avenues staring up at huge buildings until we reached the 'Grande Place'. Probably one of the most beautiful squares in the world. It was very impressive as a first starting place for our 'Grand Tour' and we marvelled at the gothic town hall, breadhouse and guildhalls, admired the pretty, intricate lacework in the windows and gorged ourselves on hand crafted Belgian chocolates, well maybe I'm exagerating a little! We searched out Brussels' most popular tourist sight, the very underwhelming 'Mannekin Pis' minature statue doing his thing.
Our first sleeping destination was in a small town called Nijmegan near the Holland Germany border. It was at the friend of a couple Stef had met in England. So on our first day we had to try to arrive there at a reasonable hour. After Brussels we hopped back on the train and travelled through Antwerp and up to Rotterdam, our first port of call in Holland. We only had about two hours, but got quite a good feeling for the place. It was very clean and well layed out. Everybody obeyed the traffic lights impeccably, you got the feeling that Jay walkers would be given life imprisonment if they transgressed, but everyone seemed to be polite and happy.
Our last stop for the day was Amsterdam. This was somehere I would definitely like to have spent longer, but again we only had a few hours. No time to check out the famous coffee bars or museums, but we were overwhelmed by the amount of very colourful bicycles here and walked along the river soaking up the vey buzzy atmosphere on this warm September afternoon.
So we were back on the train and pulled into Nijmegen station in the early evening to meet our hosts. They took us back to their house for dinner and then dropped us round their friend's house where we were going to sleep. She was away and so we had the flat to ourselves. We never got to meet the girl but after seeing her huge dumbell weights, realised she must have been a strong lass!
The following day we left our rucksacks and made the hour and a half journey south across the border into Cologne in Germany. We had a full day and were able to really get a feel for this great city. The weather was a bit grey and dull, typical for Northern Europe and we had our first look at the river Rhine. It was very wide and full of very large boats pulling cargo, not exactly pretty. In general though I liked the city, we saw several jazz clubs, even though we weren't staying for the evening. Cologne's crowning glory was the massive gothic two-spired cathedral and it was about now that Stef and I began to notice that we had some personality differences that he wasn't able to come to terms with. I really loved architecture and this cathedral was incredible from an architectural point of view, but unfortunately we were both Witnesses and for them other religions were all false and evil. Stef took on their ultra-conservative view and wasn't able to separate the religious implications. Anyway we enjoyed our day in Cologne and headed back to Nijmegen in Holland where we spent our second evening.
The next day we were up very early, bags packed and were dropped off at the station for our next port of call, Munich. This was a very long journey, about six hours I think and we arrived to some much needed sun. We headed straight for the centre and enjoyed a very tasty pork scnitzel and large local beer, one of the only meals of the holiday I can recall... Munich was a very beautiful city. The Marienpltz town hall and Frauenkirche cathedral were spectacular and in the afternoon we visited the 1972 Olympic park and were particularly impressed. A sin to spend only a part of a day there, but better than nothing.
In the early evening we hopped on the train to Salzburg and met up near the station with some Witnesses. They took us out to a restaurant for dinner and we met among others this midget guy who was very friendly, he drove a specially adapted fiat so he could reach the pedals, his determination impressed us.
We spent our first evening sleeping rough on Salzburg station. We were locked in the waiting room with about two dozen other people who all looked as dischevelled as us. In the morning we took the train to Vienna and let me tell you the shower we had that morning was one of the highlights of the holiday... Vienna was a huge city and frankly too overwhelming to see or enjoy in one day. We left our rucksacks locked in at the station and walked through an enormous park with a palace, the schonnbrunn I believe and down a very long avenue to reach the main square, Stephensplatz. Again we were confronted with an enormous Cathedral this time one of the most striking examples of Romanesque gothic churches in the world. I decided I had to go inside and get a closer look, at which point Stef stormed off and said he would wait for me back at the station. I took the lift to the top of the spire and was rewarded with some superb panoramic views of Vienna.
Stef was waiting for me back at the station and here we took the night train to Innsbruck. We both agreed that we'd had enough of churches and we wanted to see some nature. At Innsbruck we took the train up the Jungfrau mountain for our first taste of the alps. Even though it was summer there was still some snow on the mountain and we spent the day walking and climbing for some spectacular views of the Eiger mountain. It was a welcome break and finally something we could both enjoy together. After a very quick stop off in Zurich to smell the cash lined streets, our final stop was at Basel in Switzerland where we came across a group of Yodellers practising on the station, it was a surreal experience and even though I'm not a Yodelling fan I was bowled over. Again we took the night train and this time we were entering familiar territory, the motherland, Italy.
We had arranged to stay with a family on the outskirts of Milan. We had both met a girl called Patrizia who visited Worthing the previous year. Her family lived in a small village called Casorato Primo about an hour from the centre. It was nice to finally relax a bit and be pampered by a family. Patrizia had an older brother, Marco, who seemed like a real wideboy. He drove a BMW and had a girlfriend. There was also a younger brother called Stefano, she also had an older sister called Antonella. I felt a bit sorry for her. She worked in a factory making towels, while her more glamorous younger was off travelling all over the place. I kind of fancied her and nearly made a move, but we were only here a few days and I seemed to lack the confidence at the time. We all had a good time. Patrizia and her boyfriend took us up to Milan. We had a quick look at the San Siro football stadium which had just been built for the summer World cup and then went into Milan. We walked through the Sempione park and admired the Castello Sforseca. The centre of Milan was basically the square with the many spired Gothic Cathedral and the covered arcade, Galleria Vittorio Emanuele, which was very ornate, but unfortunately the facade was having a facelift and covered in scaffolding. Still we enjoyed our day in Milan. Back in Casorato Primo we went to a fair and that was about it. Patrizia was pioneering in a tiny village in the south of Italy and we agreed to meet up later on in the holiday.
For our next leg of the holiday we were in for something special. Not only were we going to visit the place where Stefano was born, but also meet for the first time in twenty years his father. We took the train to a town called Pistoia about twenty miles west of Florence, as we had arranged to stay with Stef's uncle and aunt. I'm not sure if he'd ever met them before, but they were very friendly. We agreed to meet Stef's father at a 'dopolavoro ferroviaro' working men's club, somewhere near the Cascine I believe. We were a bit early and so watched a bit of tennis at a clay court adjacent to the club. It was a very emotional occasion as you can imagine as the two were reunited. His father then proceeded to take us on an impromptu tour of Florece, introducing his long lost son to various people along the way. We walked over the Ponte Vecchio bridge and marvelled at the sculptures in Piazza Signoria. This was my kind of city! Of course little did I realise at the time that only eleven years later I would leave England and move here! He showed Stef the house he was born in, above a 'pollaiao' chicken shop and took us back to his very dingy flat. We eventually parted and I'm not sure the two ever met again...
We took the train back to Pistoia where we stayed the night ready for our next stop with my family, this time in Naples. We stayed with my cousin Antonio, his wife Nilla and there two small girls, 8 year old Anna and 3 year old Mariapia. As always they were perfect hosts. Feeding us and ferrying us around. We spent time with my cousin, Franco also and Nellino, who took us for a trip to Amalfi, which was only 20 miles from Castellammare. We took the train to Pompeii and basked in glorious sun in one of my favourite places. Of course we visited my auntie Anna and Mimi and they cooked us up a huge feast. My grandma and grandad, Tina and Michael just happened to be there at the same time too. Emelia and Franco terme? Franco Positano? We went to see another cousin, Pina whose husband was a doctor. They had just bought an apartment in a castle in Vico Equense with a spectacular view of Vesuvious and the bay of Naples.
Our most southerly destination awaited as we took the train down into Basillicata. This little known region of Italy is mostly mountainous, but we had a lot of fun driving around in Patrizia and her friend's car listening to Mango, an Italian singer and his then current album, Sirtaki. An album I would later buy. They worked as waitresse at a local pizzeria and one evening we were the guests of honour... They introduced us to some of their friends and we had a whale of a time.
Of course no trip to Italy would have been complete without a trip to the eternal city and so on our way back up the country we made a lightning stop off at Rome. I had been several times before, but it was Stef's first time. We rushed round the sights with me playing guide. We saw the circus Maximus, Colosseum, Trevi fountain and Spanish steps.
Our next port of call and last sleepover was in Vicenza, near Venice. Vicenza was the town that ex Worthing pioneer Steven Clarke had moved to. Steven was a slightly nerdy only child whose parents were the ultra conservative wheel chair bound Margaret and Eric, they had died and so after meeting this Italian guy, Giovanni who had come to Wothing to improve his English decided to move to this Italian town where there was an American airbase, with the idea of converting the families of these US airmen. It was there he met and married Patrizia and moved into her father's house. He worked part time in an English language school and at the time I remember him telling us how much he hated the Italian system and way of life. Steven and Stef shared a love of trains, so much so that they had invented a fictional raiway town and would write newsletters to each other periodically. They both had these huge model railway systems in their house. And so our visit to Vicenza, the home town of Palladio, arguably one of the greatest architects in the last two thousand years (and not a church in sight!) should have been a crowning glory for me. Unfortunately we saw nothing. Steven was living on the doorstep of all this architectural beauty and didn't appreciate it. Him and Stef poured over his model railway for hours, while I sat and twiddled my thumbs. The weather wasn't good and I had to insist we visit Venice. Reluctantly Stef tore himself away from the trains and I got my first look at the canalled city, albeit in the evening and under the rain.
From Venice we took the overnight train to Paris, but by now we were exhausted and couldn't really enjoy our few hours in the world's most romantic city. We managed a few pictures with the Eiffel Tower and then made our short journey back to Ostend and Dover.
We had visited nearly twenty towns and cities in seven different countries in only twenty one days. It had been an epic holidays with many highs and a few lows, but I think we realised then that our friendship was doomed. Stef was far too conservative and rigid for me in his views and he just couldn't come to terms with my interests and opinions and I think this lead to him cooling off with our friendship that had lasted for about six years.
Generally at that time in congregations there was an average of one or two pioneers per congregation, but in Worthing we had something like ten. So some pioneers decided to move to other congregations to 'help where the need was greater'. Michael Limmer had gone to Chichester. Steven Clarke had moved to Vicenza and at the end of the year my best friend Stef and old friend, Mark decided to make the short move to Bognor. They were baptized a year before me and a little more ambitious, but I was happy for them. They didn't particularly get on that well as friends, theirs was more of a 'working relationship', I helped them move in the Autumn and they arranged a 'pioneer day' which I went to. There were loads of young people, I met this German girl, who I quite liked, but nothing ever came of it. Mark's friend Ben was to meet future wife Maria on that day and another Worthing guy, Brett met a Bognor girl and future wife, Keziah, so it was a successful day all round! One guy who came with us was Joe Dowden. He was a someone I had first seen with Stef in Worthing town centre, he was dressed really scruffily and had a big scraggy beard. He was coming to the meetings and eventually became a witness and would marry Annette's sister Ruth.
I didn't visit Mark and Stef as often as I'd have liked and one invitation they did give me to go on a boat trip was never relayed, thanks to Saffron and so I even missed out on that.
They didn't stay in Bognor long before they got itchy feet again. What they really wanted to do was attend the newly formed 'Ministerial training school', this was an intensive course which helped male witnesses to serve in new or problem congregations. They were 'assigned' to a congregation in Shirebrook in Yorkshire. It was a bit of a shock to the system for them. I went up to their graduation in London and met up with them in the December at what would be my first of three December visits to 'Centre Parcs'. These were little villages, usually in a woodland setting, with cozy bungalows a huge indoor heated waterpark complex with this amazing 'jungle river' and lots of sports facilities. My first trip was up to Sherwood Forest and I shared a bungalow with Stef, Mark and some other friends. It was a lot of fun, there was a basketball tournament which we entered an won easily, as no one else really knew how to play!
Chapter 12
A tale of two Steves
I was still really into Basketball, in February that year I had seen my first NBA all star game. I saw New York Knicks centre, Patrick Ewing and became an instant fan. I had invited some friends round to watch the game, which included the Slam Dunk contest and cooked everyone pizza. This would become a tradition for the next few years. I was becoming friends with Steven Fraser, a young kid who had studied with Mark Berry.
That summer I went up to London with Steven for England's first Streetball tournament, which was a kind of Basketball festival. We played three on three games, swapped Basketball cards, which I'd started to collect and generally had a lot of fun. We stayed with this Carribean family in Harrow. They had a son called Tony and daughter who were about our age and we took them with us. Tony had a massive sound system and was into the same r n'b music as Steven and me. I was introduced to a new American comedy, In Living Colour, with the Wayans brothers and future superstar, Jim Carey. It was the American answer to 'The Real Mcoy,' which was another black comedy that I loved. Desmonds too was popular at the time as well as the Lenny Henry show, French and Saunders, Harry Enfield and another new American comedy 'The Fresh Prince of Bel Air' and a certain young Will Smith. They were fun times.
I also made friends with another Steve, Steve Griffin. His mother was a witness and I was asked to study with him. He had a girlfiend called Caroline and she was having a study too. He was working as an area manager for Co-op, but was working very unsociable hours and so decided he needed a job where he could control how much and when he could work. We both had the idea to team up and start our own window cleaning round. It was really tough as there were already many window cleaners in Worthing. So we enlisted the help of his mum and girlfriend and Steven Fraser and we canvassed like crazy. Eventually we built up a small round. I only needed to work two or three days a week as I was still pioneering and living at home, but he needed to work full time. We had some good times together, we would occasionally have dinner at the Yeoman pub, they did a 'six o'clock special' meal and so the two Steves, Caroline and me would take advantage of this and spend some evenings together. They were baptised soon after and got married and I was his best man at the wedding.
Stef meanwhile, before moving up to Yorkshire, had made the audacious step of asking Annette Woodland out. I was a bit surprised to say the least. He knew how much I had liked her, but had never thought to talk to me before asking her. Even more surprisingly she had said yes, although she claims she was young and foolish, probably she thought he was the kind of guy her parents liked and quickly realised her mistake, well we all make them! I really only had myself to blame as I had never told her I liked her. In hindsight though she probably would have run a mile anyway. In fact at only twenty years old, a relationship and marriage was the last thing on her mind and she was cooking up something special for her own future plans and unfortunately (for me), didn't include Worthing or even England. Some of her family had emmigrated to Hong Kong several years before and as not much was happening in Worthing decided that she'd like to travel a bit and discover life outside of England. She teamed up with Emma Atherton's old friend, Saffron who she had now become friends with and made a huge step in moving halfway round the world to Hong Kong. The idea I think was to stay for six months, but it turned out to be a bit longer. She had a going away party and I remember going and feeling as if I had missed out on something that could have been. If only I had been a bit more self confident, but Annette was not ready for a relationship at that time and broke off with Stef before she left for the far East.
In December I went on my second Centre Parcs experience, this time to Elveden forest. I stayed in a chalet with the Lobb family.
Chapter 13
New York
I was also becoming friends with another guy, Neil Andrews. I had already known him for some years, his mum, Anne was one of the sisters who invited the pioneers round for lunch. He would later become friends with my brother, Alan and was actually best man at Alan's wedding. He was into basketball too. As I was watching more NBA games on these videos I would order, we had the idea to go on holiday to New York. I would get to see my hero, Patrick Ewing and we would also have the chance to visit the Witness headquarters. Neil contacted this girl in London who knew a sister who lived in Brooklyn in New York and she agreed to find us some accomodation. I looked at the Knicks basketball schedule and managed to buy tickets over the phone to see back to back home games against the Charlotte Hornets, who had a player I liked, Larry Johnson and the Los Angeles Clippers, who had another player I liked, Charles Smith. Funnily enough both these players would eventually transfer to the Knicks. The flight was very long, about eight hours, the longest I'd ever taken and we stopped off at Philadelphia where we changed planes. We arrived at JFK airport and were welcomed by our host, the six foot five black guy, Kevin Troutman. He could have been a basketball player, but unfortunately wasn't into it. He worked in Manhattan at Bloomingdales, but lived in Flatbush in Brooklyn. The sister Neil's friend knew was called Dixie and she had some problems at home with her parents, so she had set us up with this guy. He was incredibly friendly to let these two complete strangers stay in his flat and we had a really great time. The flat was nice, but the area was a bit scary. Neil and me seemed to be the only white people. I joke now about how little black children would point at us and laugh, but it wasn't that comfortable. We bought some groceries at a local store and everyone seemed to be Hispanic and infact the storekeepers only spoke Spanish. We bought Wheaties cereal and hot dogs with cheese in the middle, it was cool to experience the US culture. The two basketball games were an awesome experience. Both were at the historic Madison Square Garden arena, a site famous for many boxing matches, as well as hockey and pop concerts. It was huge, we bought our New York vests and joined the throngs of Knicks fans in the arena. The pumping music set the scene as the players were introduced over Naughty by Nature's O.P.P. "And now out of Georgetown University number 33 Patrick Ewing... the moment I had been waiting for. The Knicks won both games fairly easy. Alonzo Mourning hadn't been drafted into the Charlotte team yet and the Clippers were pretty lame. They were two unforgettable evenings. On one ocassion we got lost on the subway and a NY cop helped show us the way home. We bought boxes of basketball cards and opened them back at Kevin's flat while watching the Arsenio Hall show. Our days were spent wandering round the famous sights of Manhattan and visiting various Witness buildings in Brokklyn. We went up the Empire State building and the 'still standing' World Trade Centre. We travelled on the Staten island ferry and saw the Statue of Liberty, walked down fifth Avenue, popping into the Rockerfeller and Lincoln Centres, the Metropolitan museum and Washington Square park. We even travelled 'up state' to see where the Watchtower magazines were printed in Walkill, but unfortunately didn't get as far as Niagra Falls. Kevin took us to Long island to have dinner with his parents and on a 'bible study' with these Puerto Rican guy who had ferrets and offered us this huge knife as a gift. His family escorted us from our car as it was a rough neighbourhood... The whole experience was quite an eye opener for Neil and I.
After Joe's brief fling, my mum and him were back together again and decided they'd had enough of the west country. They moved back to Worthing and of course I was roped in to help. Unfortunately Carl, who had gone to live in a care home, was now left 130 miles away from his family, but apparently Sussex social services were not interested in rehousing him. (York house, wardleworth ask mum...) Their address of choice was Shelby road in Durrington, not exactly the most up-market area of Worthing, but very convenient and walking distance from Tesco. Cassandra started school at the Hawthorns, it was nice to have them close to me and I was to spend more time with them, playing with Cassandra, taking her to school and helping her learn to ride a bicycle. Alan moved in with Dad and me and Rita, moved in with grandma and grandad briefly before moving into a flat by Goring station with her new boyfriend, Geordie, Michael. She was pregnant very soon after with her first daughter, Natalie.
In the summer I went up to the basketball tournament again and to Crystal Palace again with Jason Atherton, but neither quite captured the magic of the previous year. Mark Berry had met a girl, Tracey up in Shirebrook and invited me up to the wedding. I travelled up with his family, Mary, Dave, Amanda, Joy, her then boyfriend, Steve Masters, Steven Fraser and Amanda's husband, a little welsh guy called Jason Phillips. Mark's family were from Wales and they had moved back there briefly, long enough for Amanda to meet and marry Jason. The wedding went smoothly, but Tracey's father was a bit of a larger than life character and while we were there he got Me, Steve, Steven and Jason helping him do some work in his huge garden. We thought this was a bit of a cheek and Jason and Steve took spent the rest of the trip taking the mickey out of him.
I became friends with Jason, he worked as a caretaker at Durrington High school. His chess playing skills were particularly bad and I would beat him regularly. Unfortunately his marriage to Mark's sister Amanda deteriorated and eventually they split up and he came to stay with me at my dad's for a while.
1993 was fairly uneventful, I was still pioneering and window cleaning with Steven Griffin. Still playing basketball and football down Goring gap and at the sports centre. The Worthing Bears had gone from Division 1 to the Premier league in the previous season, with legandary players such as Dale Shackleford, Gary Sparks, Herman Harried coming and going and at the end of this season with a completely rebuilt squad including Alan Cunningham, Colin Irish and Ronnie Baker managed to reach the play offs. I went up to Wembley arena with Steven Fraser and unbelievably we won a memorable final against our arch rivals Thames Valley Tigers.
I also went up to Crystal Palace for the last time with Jason Atherton,
I went to a couple of concerts locally that year, the most interesting being the Jeff Lyne-less Electric Light Orchestra performing with the Russian Philharmonic Orchestra at the Brighton centre with Jason Atherton. It was a very interesting rock meets classical experience. The other concert I went to was with my mum to see the Drifters in Worthing.
We started a tradition on Christmas day in of going ice skating at rinks in Streatham and Guilford as it was free and there were tons of other Witnesses there too.
By 1994 my work partner Steven Griffin had decided he really needed more work and the window cleaning was taking its toll, so he decided to go back into retail. He left me the ladders and the round, but the only problem was I hadn't learned to drive yet, so how was I going to continue? I had taken a few lessons some years back with Laurence Dunford, when I was working with Paul Limmer, the idea was to use his car, but he had a small crash and I stopped my lessons. This time it was mum to the rescue. She agreed to drive me around while I took lessons. I managed to pass my test first time and at the ripe old age of 25 bought my first car. It was a second hand burgundy D reg 1987 ford Escort, it looked good on the outside, I had even taken Jim Wright to check it over, but a year later I discovered it had rusted underneath. However I was finally mobile, after years of cycling everywhere and relying on the train and friends for longer journeys. Friends would now ask me for lifts and for several years I was to be the local taxi service for the Worthing youngsters. Steven and Caroline soon stopped being Witnesses and I stopped decorating their house, which I had agreed to do in exchange for the ladders, but that's how it goes. They had a daughter soon after, but I never saw them again.
My group of friends was beginning to include Dean Lobb, Jaime Stapleton and Turner Hallet. They were younger than me and I would cart them around in my car. We all liked sports such as tennis, basketball and especially football and would play at various locations in and around Worthing and watch games on Sky Sports. We had a great laugh, usually at Dean's expense.
Mum decided to move on from Shelby road, but for some reason to Crawley. It was short lived as they hated it and after a spate of local stabbings there she was back in Worthing only six months later. Unbelievably they moved into a house in Canterbury Road, opposite her ex-husband. Again this was short lived and they moved again to Somerset close in Thomas A' Beckett, in just under ten years she had gone full circle.
That summer I went with mum and Joe to the convention in Leeds at the football ground, Elland road. We stayed with an Irish couple who were going to get baptised. I finally got to meet some of Joe's family. I went up to London again with Steven Fraser and this time we managed to sell our collection of basketball cards for the princely sum of £400.
I also saw Annette that year. Her six months had turned into three years and counting, but she generally came back to see her parents every August. Unfortunately our paths never seemed to cross, but I saw her at Anna and Henry Orange's wedding and she looked as good as ever.
I went to a couple of interesting concerts that year. One was the Greek New Age pianist called Yanni. I fist discovered Yanni on the soundtrack to the 'Come Fly with me' video about Michael Jordan. The music was this kind of softer jazz fusion. David Benoit was another pianist featured and along with Yanni introduced me to New Age music. His concert was at the Royal Albert hall and I went up with Jason Atherton. It was an incredible concert as he performed with a full orchestra and it was a great setting. I also saw one of my old favourite soul groups the Stylistics performing in Worthing.
Two TV shows that started that year were 'The Fast Show' with Harry Enfield's old pal, Paul Whitehouse and the American comedy 'Friends' both of which turned out to be classics and would go on to define a generation.
1995 was a very interesting year, my window cleaning round was going ok and I was still doing some decorating here and there. I hung out with Steven Fraser, Jason Phillips and Dean Lobb. He had been diagnosed with M.E. and was taking up hairdressing at Northbrook college. I agreed to be his first guinea pig and would spend the best part of an hour at the college crossing my fingers that I would come out with my ears intact! My car failed it's M.O.T. And had completely rusted underneath. I sold it and bought a beige Vauxhall Cavalier. It was older, but bigger and faster.
My music of choice, Soul took a new twist this year with the release of a song called 'Brown Sugar' by D'Angelo. Although it's routes were founded with Tony Toni Toné and Mint Condition. This was closely followed by Maxwell and his 'Urban Hang Suite' album and then Erykah Badu and her 'Baduism' album completing the birth of what I called 'New Classic Soul', but would later be called, 'Neo-soul'. It was softer and more melodic than the previously harder edged New Jack Swing.
At the Academy Awards that year an Italian film, Il Postino, had been nominated for five awards and won one Oscar. It was to have a profound effect on my life, especially later when I bought the soundtrack and was introduced to the poetry of Pablo Neruda.
Chapter 14
Back to Italy
In April it was my Grandma and grandad's 50th wedding anniversary. A pretty impressive achievement. They had decided to return to Castellammare and have a special service. All the family were invited. I went with mum, Joe and Cassandra and Rita and Michael. My auntie Lisa and Fiorella came too and Tina rounded out the English contingent. Obviously many of the family from Naples were invited too, the only problem was where everybody would sleep. We flew from Heathrow to Capodichino in Naples and were picked up by Antonio. Mum, Joe and Cassandra stayed with cousins, Tilda and Pasquale and Rita and Michael with Antonio. I was taken to auntie Anna's and as the evening wore on I was wondering where I was going to sleep. Downstairs from Anna there was this very old widower who we nicknamed 'the old man of the sea' because of his ample white beard. Apparently it had been agreed that I was going to sleep with him. I took my case downstairs and he pointed me in the direction of his room. I didn't speak much Italian, but he indicated to me that I could have one side of his double bed and he would be on the other side! I'm not sure what I said, but he must have realised that I didn't want to sleep with him and so he made up a little bed on the sofa. I never lived that experience down for the whole week.
We had a great time. For the first time I actually visited the city of Naples. Joe and I bought Napoli football shirts, so we were quite safe and infact people kept stopping us in the street and congratulated us and shook our hands. It wasn't common back then to wear football shirts in the street like in England. We were quite a hit! We had this amazingly simple but tasty pizza down a backstreet, probably the best pizza I've ever had and we weren't robbed.
We went on the cable car up mount Faito, to the 'scavi' at Pompeii, Sorrento and even on a day trip to Rome. This was quite funny as Grandma, Fiorella and Lisa came too. We met this relative of my grandma and he took them to lunch while me, mum, Joe, Cassie, Rita and Michael decided to do some sightseeing. When we met back up at the station, Fiorella and Lisa were really annoyed because they had spent all afternoon in a restaurant while we had seen tons of stuff. The colosseum, the Trevi fountain, Spanish steps and the Vatican. As I had been several times before I knew all the best sights and the quickest way to see them. I felt very satisfied that day.
That summer the district convention was held at the Brighton centre for the first time and me and Steven Fraser went to some great concerts. We went up to the Grand in London to see the Jazz guirtarist Ronny Jordan and went up again to London to the Hammersmith to see a mega-concert with English duo The Affair, American soulstress, Angie Stone and US super gospel group, The Sounds of Blackness, suffice to say it was an incredible evening.
In 1996 I was becoming more interested in football. In 1992 Paul 'Gazza' Gascoine had gone to Lazio in Italy and T.V.'s Channel 4 had started an Italian football programme to follow his fortunes. It was presented by journalist, James Richardson and he would visit a different Italian city each week and usually be seen drinking a large cocktail as he interviewed these flamboyant Italian stars. I started following the show and after a couple of years this young player called Alessandro Del Piero was making a name for himself. He was incredible. Although he was very small, he had incredible skill and would produce these one or two moments of magic that would leave you speechhless. In June they won the European cup against Ajax, for me it was up there with Italy's world cup win in 1982 and Juventus' 1986 European cup win. I had been following him and Juventus for a few years, but I needed a team closer to home to identify with. I didn't really relate to Leeds United, although they were still in the Premier league at that point. And then in the summer of 1996 ex Milan star and Dutch master Ruud Gullit became manager of Chelsea. He signed Italian trio, ex Sampdoria scoring ace Gianluca Vialli, ex Lazio midfielder, Roberto DI Matteo and the little ex Parma wizard, Gianfranco Zola. Finally here was a team in England I could identify with.
I was spending more time with Jason Phillips. He was having problems with his marriage to Amanda, he worked at Durrington high school as a caretaker. Steven Fraser and I would play basketball in the school gym and we would work out in the weight room. That spring I filnally got to see one of my musical heroes, Luther Vandross. I went up to Wembley Arena in London with Rita and Fiorella to see a wonderful concert. A 45 years old he was in his prime, but was to die prematurely in 2005 at the age of only 54, so I'm glad I took that opportunity.
In the summer we were at the Brighton Centre for the district convention again and who should I bump into, but 'that' girl, Annette Woodland. I managed to say hello and have a brief conversation with her and it kind of sparked something in me. I kept thinking about her and wondering if there was any way I could get something going. she was still single, I still really liked her, but I was still clueless as to what to do. She returned to Hong Kong, as usual and that was that.
I was still plodding on with the window cleaning, occasionally working with Steven Fraser to ease the boredom of working on my own and I was also doing the odd decorating job. The pioneering took on a new impetus for me, after some years of plugging away without much interest or success. This was due to the large Italian community that lived in Worthing. One elder, the very annoying Gerald Yeates had moved to Worthing from Horsham and thought maybe we could get something going, i.e. make a list of all the Italian people who lived in Worthing and contact them seperately from the English residents. Some of these Italians would be second generation, but there were many first generation Italians who would maybe like to have literature in their mother tongue. So I looked up all the Italian names in the phone book and we made maps of their addresses. There were two or three hundred addresses and we were quite pleased with ourselves and it made a bit of a change from the usual work. There was also Francesca Guanieri and Paul and Anna Baker who helped in these early days.
Stef got married to Karen Garlic, a Yorkshire girl who had moved down to Worthing. Stef had become good friends with Wayne Blake, whose father Geoff was an elder and Wayne was his best man. I didn't feel too bad about this, Stef and I had really drifted apart as friends, even though he invited me to his wedding. He didn't invite my mother, which I felt bad about, seeing as she had been the one to first talk to him about the Witnesses and without whom he wouldn't have been where he was. Stef and Karen decided to apply for overseas service and the choice was between Sicily in Italy and Sri Lanka. They chose Sri Lanka and in preparation decided move up to Streatham near London to learn the language and help in a Singalese congregation with the growing Sri Lankan population in London. They invited me up for a weekend and I decided it was probably the last time I would see Stef properly, as he was now married and was going to be leaving the country. I wanted some closure and to go out with a bang. So I recorded some of our old favourite songs on a cassette, with descriptions of how I felt about our relationship and decided to cook them up a fancy last meal. I had been writing down these recipes of some of my grandma's signature dishes, brought all the ingredients up in a cool box and sure enough did this amazing, melanzane alle parmigiana, veal and polenta meal for them.
It seemed to work, we had an ok time, said our goodbyes and I drove off into the sunset, I think we both knew it was the last time we would see or speak to each other, at least as friends.
In the December Joe Mullen had the brilliant idea of going up to Leeds to watch a football match. he realised how much I liked Chesea and made the 200 mile journey in his little mini metro. It was my first ever real taste of Premiership football, but unfortunately things didn't go Chelsea's way. Leeds scored early on and ex Liverpool hero Ian Rush made it 2-0 in ten minutes. I got to see some of my heroes, Zola, Vialli, Di Matteo and even Ruud Gullit, who was player manager. It was a great experience, even if Chelsea were beaten, but Joe was happy. Joe knew how much I loved football and that my real father had never taken me to a match, so I think there were ulterior motives, but we enjoyed it. On December 24th on my 28th birthday, my sister gave birth to her second daughter, named appropriately, Holly.
In the spring of 1997 one of my favourite groups of the 70's, Kool and the gang were playing an outdoor concert in Gosport along with another 70's group, Odyssey. I went with my mum and auntie Fiorella and it was a pretty cool evening, until the sound system blew up and the concert was cut short. It was a bit disappointing, but at least I got to see them perform.
Chapter 15
Annette
Summer 1997 was the year the penny finally dropped, the year that everything changed for me. I did a lot of thinking and soulsearching about what I really wanted and decided it was now or never with Annette. If I didn't do something I would lose her forever. I heard she was planning to return to England after the reunification of Hong Kong to China. The 99 year lease to England luckily for me was up in June this year, if it hadn't been maybe she would have stayed there and I may have still been living in Worthing, who knows, but I think she was ready to move on anyway.
Jason Phillips divorced Amanda and moved in with me and Dad, temporarily while he looked for a flat. I ran past him the idea of taking the Annette thing further and although he was going through a divorce, told me that if that was what I wanted the I should go for it. He gave me the reassurance and confidence I needed to make that first step.
I heard that she was coming over in August for her usual month's holiday before going back and wrapping things up in November and maybe moving back to England in the December.
One reason we never saw each other was that when she came back every August she would go with her parents to the Broadwater meetings, while I was in the Durrington congregation, so this time I decided I would turn up at the end of her meeting try and talk to her and maybe suggest meeting up for a drink or something. I remember nervously waiting at he back of the hall, but she was surrounded by loads of people wanting to talk to her, it would have been easier to get an audience with the Pope! Feeling somewhat frustrated, I waited in the car park and got chatting to someone else. I noticed her come out of the hall and get into the car with her parents. As they pulled away she spotted me and gave a smile and a little wave and they drove off into the evening. I drove back home somewhat crestfallen and went to the North Star pub with Jason to drown my sorrows. As I was having a drink I thought why don't I just phone her and ask her out for a drink. So I plucked up the courage and spoke to her somewhat nervously. She said she was really happy to have seen me at the hall and said yes, she'd love to come for a drink with me. We made a date for the following Tuesday at the same pub, the North Star.
Inbetween time I frantically prepared what I was going to say. I had just drawn a sketch of the Mona Lisa that I wanted to give her and did a 'mix tape' of some of my favourite love songs and waited for my big chance. On the Saturday afternoon before our big date I took Dean and Kayleigh to play tennis with Eric Ismay and who should be there but Annette. She was accompanying her young niece, Bernice. It was a bit surreal as we played tennis together, exchanging familiar glances of sporting moments of years ago. Bernice later remarked to Annette that we looked good together on the court. Afterwards I dropped Annette and Bernice off home.
So to the big day. I went off to my book study group at Sandra Nighy's as usual and afterwards played some football with Bobby and showed Chloe and Hannah my hand walking skills and then drove off to the North Star to my date with destiny. I was wearing my black suit trousers and a short sleeved bright tangerine orange shirt. Annette was wearing a plum top and some loose silky trousers. It was a warm August evening, we got our drinks and I pointed out a print of Palladio's 'La Rotonda' building in Vicenza that I liked and we sat outside in the garden. There followed the most incredible evening, we chatted about the old days when we were teenagers, Hong Kong, our thoughts on the future and how many children we wanted, nothing too heavy! At the end of the evening I gave her my sketch and mix tape, but told her not to listen to any of the lyrics. We got on very well, were very relaxed and the evening flew by. I was crazy about her. She had grown from a pretty, cheeky, playful, fun teenage girl that I had fancied all those years ago, into a beautiful, thoughtful, intelligent woman. My gut feeling had been right all along, this was a possibility, she could be 'the one'.
As things turned out, it was to be the defining moment of my life.
A couple of days later I received a short letter from her, saying how she'd enjoyed our evening and that even though we had known each other for many years only now had she begun to know me better. I was in seventh heaven as I kept reading the letter, it was the glimmer of hope I needed. I decided I had to see her again before she left for Hong Kong and possibly out of my life forever. I had a bit of a rubbish idea and phoned her to ask if she wanted to go to Durrington high school with me and Jason, to have a look at her old school, but understandably she wasn't keen on that. I could hear my mix tape playing in the background very loudly. A few days later she phoned me while I was cleaning the windows at Thomas A' Beckett middle school. I think she realized I was interested in her more than just as a friend, she told me that she had recently been in a relationship in Hong Kong that hadn't worked out and wasn't ready for anything serious at the moment, you can imagine my disappointment. I asked if I could write to her while she was back in Hong Kong, just as friends and she said that would be ok. The day before she was due to leave I called round her parents who by now had moved from Adversane road to Hawthorn Crescent off of Broadwater green. I gave her this huge book on Italy, totally impractical to take on a flight. You see she wasn't planning to stay in the Uk for long when she returned in the December, so I wanted her to think of Italy as a possible destination rather than the other place she was thinking about, South America. I gave her a little kiss on the cheek, bade her bon voyage and that was that. There began the most painful four months of my life. So close and yet so far.
I didn't wait long before preparing my letter. It was just after I had been up to Wembley Arena in London to see American soul singer, Toni Braxton in concert. I went up with Jim Wright's two daughters, Rosemary and Gemma and Rosemary's boyfriend. We stopped in Brixton to see Annette's old Hong Kong flatmate, Saffron, who had by now moved back to England, on the way and it was a brilliant concert. I sent her this poem I had written, but trying to be a bit clever I had it translated into Spanish and Italian and sent only those two version not the English one. It was called 'The spirit of a butterfly'. I had gone to my most cultured friend, Paul Baker, for some poetry advice and he pointed me in the direction of Gerard Manley Hopkins and his masterpiece 'The Windhover'. Paul had become a good friend. He was married to an Italian woman, Anna and had even lived in Rome for a year. He loved Art and Literature and was a source of great inspiration to me at the time, even though he was an Inter Milan and West Ham supporter!
That Autumn I must have written about twenty poems, some of which I sent to Annette. I got friendly with Annette's nephew and niece Rory and Bernice and told Rory that I really liked his aunt and that we were writing. Annette wrote back fairly quickly even though she must have been incredibly busy at the time and I poured over her letter many times. I wote again and when she hadn't replied I phoned her, almost too eagerly. She wrote back just before her December flight and I eagerly waited her arrival, poor girl!
Her sister, Ruth arranged a surprise party and I was invited. I think she was a bit surprised to see me there. There were lots of people there including her friend Claire Vincent and boyfriend at the time, Adam Bangay. Lisa and Gary Nighy and some others. A few days later Lisa and Gary were moving house, I went along to help them and who should be there but Annette. It was the first time I was to be introduced to her good friend, Samsara (a perfume my dear!)
Again we barely spoke, just stole glances at each other. The following weekend the Worthing Bears basketball team were playing, although now they had a new name, Thunder. By chance I think her nephew Rory had invited her and we inadvertantly met again. This time we sat together and chatted, it may have been the nostalgia of past basketball matches at the sports centre. A few weeks later and Jason Atherton had arranged for a group of friends to go to a Jools Holland concert at the Brighton centre and he had a spare ticket. I suggested Annette to him and there we were, in the space of three weeks we had seen as much of each other than we had in the past ten years! The concert wasn't really my cup of tea, but Claire swapped seats so Annette was sitting next to me, a bit of matchmaking on her part? I wasn't sure.
Chapter 16
'Going Out'
At the beginning of December I decided the time was right and I asked her out on a proper date, for dinner at the Tudor pub in Ferring. The intention was if it went well to ask her out officially. I was a bit nervous as we ate our meal and we chatted about what we both wanted for the future, hopes and goals, she made it clear she didn't want to stay In Worthing or England and I assured her that I liked the idea of maybe moving to Italy, even though I had no idea how to make it happen. Whether we wanted children etc. some pretty heavy topics for a first date. But she wanted to be sure that if we went out, we were both serious about it. She had already been hurt once before and didn't want it to happen again without being sure. She drove me back to the Atherton's, where I was cat sitting and I said to her that maybe it was time I asked her out, I think I had a rose for her, it was terribly romantic, if a bit old fashioned and she said yes. She wanted to keep it quiet and fairly low key, so that if it didn't work out, we could break it off without everyone in the congregation wouldn't be talking about it.
Obviously I was over the moon. She found a job working in a Language school in Hove and then rented a flat in Dolphin Lodge in Grand Avenue. Rory and Bernice were thrilled as I already knew them fairly well. Annette's mum and dad, Charlie and Mavis couldn't have been better in accepting me as a new suitor. My mum was happy as she thought a lot of Annette from past experience when she was friends with Rita and on one of our earlier dates I took her to meet my grandma and grandad. We had coffee and cake and watched 'Il Postino' the film that had introduced me to poetry. My grandma fell in love with her and even mentioned the 'M' word, but it was very early on in our 'courtship'.
Here started my most incredible year. It was a kind of 'celebration' 'home coming' 'honeymoon' 'party' rolled into one!
Our first real outing was to Brighton. We booked a table at Italian restaurant 'Al Forno's' and enjoyed a wicked pizza. Afterwards we saw a film at the cinema, 'The Wings of the Dove', I believe, which included a very steamy love scene. We enjoyed ourselves, but I do remember drying up a bit with my conversation and wondered if I'd bitten off more than I could chew, but things improved.
We spent an evening at my mum's watching the film adaptation of a book that Annette and I had been reading while she was in Hong Kong. The book, The portrait of a Lady, by Henry James was to make a lasting impression on our lives. The heroine's name was Isabel Archer...
As well as family we also broke the news to our close friends and soon got invitations for dinner so they could see us together, congratulate us and question us. They were all very happy and excited for us as many of them had known us both as teenagers. During the winter months we went for a meal in Brighton with Henry and Anna Orange. Paul and Anna Baker had us round for dinner and another couple we became particularly close to were Helen and Matthew Ivy. Helen was the sister of my one-time mentor, Peter Marshall-Saye, who had since left the Witnesses, married and divorced and moved to Chard in Somerset.
In the January we went to the ballet in Brighton, but the star of the night was a very tight, velvet, red dress that Annette wore. We went to Brighton soon after for a meal with our gang of friends to Old Orleans where we had a 'sharing platter' a sign we were becoming an item!
In February we went up to London with my mum and Cassie. The reason was a for a Michelangelo exhibition at the Queen's gallery, but we made a day of it, seeing all the sights and going on a Thames cruise and finishing with a steak dinner in SoHo.
Obviously we spent some evenings round Ruth's house and Charlie and Mavis' too.
Our Italian ministry was going quite well and so Steven Fraser and I decided to enrol in some Italian language lessons at Northbrook college. It was mainly for people going on holiday, but it was fun. Our teacher was a lady called Rita and our coursebook based on the city of Orvieto. Steven missed most of the lessons, but I attended all of them, sharing with Annette what I had learned.
As the spring came we spent many days in various outdoor locations. On the May day holiday we went to Tillgate park with mum, Cassie and a young Natalie, with Steven Fraser to see old soul crooner Alexander O'Neal at the Worthing Pavillion and up to Sheffield park in Kent where we climbed on haystacks and afterwards went for a very nice meal in Haywards Heath run by celebrity chef Tony Tobin. We were back in Brighton to see new English soul singer, Lynden David Hall and in June we went up to Wimbledon where we got outside court tickets and saw Martina Hinghis and Jana Novotna.
We went up to London to the Palladian style Chiswick house. Annette bought me a book on Palladio and I bought her a ceramic biscuit barrel, both of which we still have to this day! The house was splendid and in the evening we saw our first Opera together, Puccini's La Boheme, it was the start of another beautiful relationship...
A great opportunity came up for me in June. Steven Fraser had been training with the Worthing basketball team for some time and the players would also do some coaching at local schools. Steven was asked too, but he had to take a coaching course to be able to do it. He asked me if I wanted to join him and so we both went up to Brighton for a couple of weekends. It was an official English Basketball Association Coaching Award and would mean I could also coach at schools. We had a lot of fun and I learned a lot. At first I went along with Steve to watch him and then assist him. The kids were great, they thought I was a famous player and even asked for my autograph! My five minutes of fame...
The woman who organised these coaching sessions, Janet liked what she saw and asked if I was interested in doing some coaching on my own. The idea was to go to a school and conduct one or two hour coaching sessions and the pay was quite good. I could do my window cleaning or decorating in the morning and then drive on to a school. By the end of the year I was going to four or five schools a week, all over East and West Sussex and Surrey, Brighton, Eastbourne and driving as far as Hastings and Weybridge-on-Thames. It was much more fun than cleaning windows!
I went up with Annette to London again, first to the Jazz cafe for what should have been a great night, as one of my all-time favourite singers, the very reclusive, Sam Dees was performing. He came on sang acouple of songs and then refused to carry on as he said he had a bad throat and couldn't continue... is was one of the most disappointing nights of my life. We were back in London not long after to see a last night of the Proms classical concert at the very beautiful Kenwood house.
The summer was hot and long. We went putting at Brooklands and took Rory, Bernice and Sean Tugnutt to West Wittering for a memorable day at the beach. It was very windy and I don't think we actually went swimming in the sea, but it was a chance to see Annette in her swimsuit!
Chapter 17
Engagement
By now it was becoming apparent that we were getting on really well. We both had similar interests and principals, laughed and cried at the same things and knew how to have a good time. I was the happiest I'd ever been and Annette seemed to be happy too. I had taken on an extra job working nights at the Esso service station next to the North Star pub and I decided it was time to pop the question, but needed a proposal with a bit of pizazz! It was while reading a magazine article about the French Impressionist painter, Claude Monet that the idea came to me. He had a house in the town of Giverny to the west of Paris. Wouldn't it be something if I took her to Paris and proposed on the Japanese bridge amongst all those beautiful water lillies... It was a stroke of genius!
It was a bit obvious I was cooking up something special when I told her was taking her somewhere as a surprise and she had to bring her passport. She played along and we drove to Dover to catch the ferry. She had an idea when I started to drive towards Paris. Unfortunately we were running out of day and it was apparent that I wasn't going to be able to do this in a day. So she phoned her mum to tell her we were going to stay overnight in Paris and come back the following day. We drove on to Paris had a wonderful time, a romantic dinner and booked into a very cheap B&B. I think she thought I was going to pop the question then.
The next day we drove on to Giverny and Monet's wonderful garden. It was a perfect location. I had drawn a sketch of her and written a poem and as we walked over the bridge and I read the poem which ended with the words “... and so I ask you today to be my wife.” For once she was speechless and sputtered out “Yes, I will!” It was as if time stood still. I wanted to drink in that moment forever. We were both all smiles and couldn't wait to get back to tell our family and friends.
Of course everyone was very happy for us, but then who doesn't like a good old love story. Most people said that they knew once we were going out that we'd get married and they were so right! I didn't have a ring as I knew Annette wanted to choose one herself. We went to the Lanes in Brighton and it didn't take long to find a huge Sapphire surrounded by diamond engagement ring, similar and only slightly smaller (and less expensive!) than the one Princess Diana had.
We arranged two engagement parties. One for our friends and one for both families. For the family party we decided on Al Forno's pizzeria. the site of one of our first dates. It took a bit of arranging, getting everyone lifts to Brighton. There was my mum and dad, my brother Alan and sister Rita and her partner Michael. My grandma, grandad and auntie Tina. From Annette's family there was her mum and dad, sister Ruth, Joe, Rory and Bernice. On the morning of the party I bought loads of flowers and took them to the restaurant with Rory. We had a great evening, the pizzas were good and both families got on well.
For our friends party we decided on another Brighton restaurant, Cafe de Paris, quite fitting considering my proposal! We heard that after the meal, people would dance on the tables! It sounded like our kind of place... the boys were , Steven Fraser, Dean Lobb, Jason Phillips, Neil Dear, Mark Rusby, Richard and David Jones and Adam Bangay. The girls were Claire Vincent, Saffron, Andrea, Cherry Dexter, Jackie Rusby... and Suffice to say it was a pretty exciting evening. Everybody had a great time and the dancing on the tables afterwards was a big hit!
Many of our older friends invited us round for dinner and to congratulate us too. Bob and Denise Wright, Jim and Denise Wright, Gary and Lisa Nighy, Helen and Matthew Ivy and Gary and Sam Woodhams being some of them. One of Annette's old friends from Hong Kong, Karen, who had moved back to England was getting married and invited us up to her wedding to Stan. It was up towards London. Annette was also reaquainted with two other ex Hong Kong pals, Sarah and Helen as well as a black guy called Gary she had met in Hong Kong who I think had probably had a thing for her. In the evening they had a live band, well actually two guys called Max and Paul who played our kind of old classic soul music and kept the dancefloor buzzing all evening! We were just starting to think about our wedding plans and that evening we found our band...
We both agreed that it would be better to get married as soon as we could and that Spring would probably have been best, but as we started to make some appointments to look at places for possible receptions we began to think that we would like somewhere with an outside area for guests and maybe we would have more chance of a sunny day if we had a Summer Wedding.
We saw maybe a dozen places, including Field Place in Worthing, places in Findon, West Chiltington and Steyning, but in the end found our ideal location, a private school called Dorset House in Bury near Arundel. It was perfect, beautiful grounds, an old stone building and big barn with two rooms and most importantly we could bring in our own caterers. It was a lot more expensive than any of the others, but we decided the location was very important. We decided early on to have a local sister, Jill Burnet to do the catering. She had catered several other friend's weddings and I really liked what she had done. She was also to do the cake and all for a very reasonable price. We booked Dorset House and the date we chose was 24th of July the following year.
That winter, in between being invited for dinners at friends' houses like Helen and Matthew and a couple of days out, most notably to London for a Monet exhibition and UB40 concert and another time to see Miss Saigon at Covent Garden, most of our time was taken up with wedding plans.
New Year's Eve and we both found ourselves round Ruth's house, eleven years after she had spent a New Year's round our house at Highdown Avenue as children and now we were planning to get married... the fairy tale had come full circle.
In the new year I toyed with the idea of trying to get out of window cleaning. The basketball coaching was better, but only part time, I needed one full time job with a bit more security. When I was younger I had wanted to be an Architect, a job which requires seven years at university! So as an alternative, at Northbrook they were running evening courses in AutoCad. This was a computer program becoming popular for architects and designers and may have helped me to get into a design job. I enrolled and spent one evening a week at the Broadwater road site. At the end of the course I passed my exam and received a 'city and guilds' certificate and started looking for a new job. I went on several interviews and the same problem came up... no experience, but at least I had tried.
As a somewhat alternative, I started working with Annette's brother-in-law, Joe Dowden. He had a huge window cleaning round, principally in Surrey, where he used to live. I would go up with him one day a week and clean these beautiful, enormous houses in some really pretty villages like Albury and Shalford, it was very good money and at first interesting working with Joe as he never stopped talking and had an opinion about everything. I also did some window cleaning with another gut, Matthew Ivy, who had married my old friend, Peter marshall-Saye's sister Helen and Annette and I starte to become friends with them.
The wedding plans were in full swing and we were deciding on flowers, arranged by Rosemary Collins. Annette had wedding dresses to try on and bridesmaids dresses to choose. We asked my sister Cassie and Annette's niece, Bernice as well as cousins Kellyanne and Hayley to be our bridesmaids and chose a dark purple material that my auntie Lisa and friend Roberta were going to make. I asked Steven Fraser to be my best man. Jason Phillips had moved out and shacked up with a young cleaner and subsequently left the witnesses. I could have asked my good friend Dean Lobb or Rory, but they were a little young. We asked Jim Wright to do the wedding talk which would be at the Kingdom Hall and Annette's dad's friend, Gordon Latham to lend us his white Jaguar to add some panache to the day. Every detail was meticulously planned. Annette, me and Annette's parents split the cost three ways and we got to choose pretty much everything we wanted.
As spring approached everything fell into place. A bizarre occurance was the wedding of my younger brother, Alan. He had been going out with a rather large and extremely ugly girl called Kerry, who also had no personality and they decided to get married three months before us. It seemed like it was a fairly rushed affair and was the complete opposite of what we were doing, that is except for their choice of honeymoon destination... Zante, which turned out to be the exact location we had chosen... too much of a coincidence really, but we saw the funny side of it.
We also had another big decision to make. Where we were going to live. We had pretty much decided that our long term future together lie outside of England, but agreed we needed somewhere nice, from which after we had settled down for a year or so we could plot our escape from this doomed country...
Again we looked at several pretty non descript flats until we saw an advert for what appeared to be a very pretty little cottage somewhere in the countryside, but was actually off of Sea Lane... We got the address and went to investigate ourselves before the making an appointment with the agent. After looking at it only from the outside we called up the agent and told them we wanted it! It was a two-bedroomed end of terrace house called Malthouse Cottages in Jeffries Lane, a road I never knew existed in thirty years of living in Worthing, it was perfect!
As the summer approached we were consumed with wedding plans and spent the odd afternoon escaping all the work. In May we chilled out up Devil's dyke in Brighton and Leonardslee gardens in Cowfold, running for cover in the spring rain. The last day out we had before the wedding was at Joe's painting exhibition in Albury where we helped out.
We arranged our hen and stag nights. Annette went out for a meal with her friends and went to the 'Genghis Khan' restaurant in Brighton and dancing afterwards at the jazz rooms. Both evenings went smoothly. My final drink was a couple of nights before the wedding when I went to finalize some arrangements at Dorset House with Steven and Jim Wright.
Chapter 18
The Wedding Day and Honeymoon
And so the big day had arrived. The 24th of July 1999...
I awoke to a perfect summer's day I dressed and drove down the town. I bought some multi-coloured- socks which I would surprise Annette with later and went for a coffee at the continental cafe in Warwick street. Those were the days before Costa and Cafe Nero in England. I drove back home, where Steven Fraser was waiting for me. We both drove our cars to Random Hall in Slindon, where Annette and me would be spending the night much later, dropped my green Cavalier off and then drove me back home. I showered and changed into my new dark navy suit, dark blue buttoned down shirt, silver Cecil Gee tie and black Red or Ded loafers that had just arrived in time. We then drove to the Kingdom hall. It was probably about an hour and a half before the start and we checked that everything was in place. My other ushers, Dean Lobb, Rory, Mark Rusby, Chris Vincent, Neil Dear, Richard and David Jones arrived and everyone took their places. My uncle Derek arrived to take a few photos of me and Steven spinning basketballs out the front and we started to welcome the guests...
My half of the morning was decidedly more relaxing than my bride-to-be! Her hairdresser, Chris Glover arriving nice and early and a make up appointment to rush off to and back home to get dressed it was all action. All I had to to was wait... We had a couple of hundred of seats laid out at the hall and quite a few people came that weren't invited to the reception. We had invited 160 to that! It was strange to see many of my family setting foot inside the Kingdom hall for the first time, as well as Annette's brother, Phil who came here as a child, but left the witnesses when he went up to University in Cambridge.
Cue music... which we had chosen, Autumn from Vivaldi's four seasons. I looked round and this angel in ivory-white was floating down the aisle on the arm of her father, Charlie. Her bridesmaids in dark purple followed, my sister, Cassie, her niece, Bernice and two cousins, Kellyanne and little Hayley. Kellyanne was unwell, but soldiered on. There were a few other notable absences that day. Ian Lobb, Paul Limmer and David Lusted were all ill... what a day to miss! I had invited some of my old friends (and ex Annette admirers) Ben Lobb and Mark Berry for a bit of spice, but unfortunately the big scalp, Stef, had already moved to Sri Lanka. Now that would have been a heart breaker! However this was to be a happy day with everybody sharing the love. My pal, Jim Wright gave a very nice talk, although looking back many years later it was extremely sexist. As the Witnesses followed the Bible to the letter, Annette as the wife, had to worship and obey me as head of the family, something some of the male members of my family thought was a good idea at the time, but now seemed quite ridiculous. Steven Fraser had remembered the rings, but I had trouble slipping it on Annette's finger, as it was such a hot day! We made our vows and signed the register, Dean Lobb and Saffron providing signatures as our witnesses and so the deed was done.
We made our way out of the hall and into the car park as husband and wife, Mr and Mrs Cooper. everyone showered us with kisses and congratulations and we had a few photos taken, the majority would be taken at the reception. Gordon Latham was waiting with his white Jag to take us to Dorset house. We arrived and welcomed everyone in. It was a beautiful day, the sun was scorching, we couldn't have dreamed it better. The setting was stunning. Beautiful gardens and the two barns were decorated perfectly. Michael and Claire Limmer led a team of helpers in transforming the simple barns into a sumptuous flower paradise. Jill Burnett had many helpers too, ironically enough Laura Blake, now married to Wayne, who I had met all those years ago in Taunton was helping too, I think Annette would have liked her to have been invited, but Wayne Blake was someone I definitely didn't want there, so it was kind of nice she got to see Annette. While everyone was enjoying the lovely gardens and our canapes and drinks, we got started on some photos with Derek of just us two. In fact most of our favourite photos of the day were taken before the more formal group photos. Then we returned to the large amphitheatre for the group photos. I received a surprise phone call from Antonio in Italy sending us best wishes from all the family there. Unfortunately I didn't invite anyone from Italy as we already had far too many guests. I had invited some of my dad's side of the family, but wasn't too disappointed when none of them even had the decency to reply! Once again they had shown their true colours. My nan was there and that was who really mattered.
After the extensive photo session, we were ready to go inside and eat. I think everyone must have been starving at this point, as I always am after a church service and seemingly endless photos. Our band had been warming up and sounded pretty good. The song that would epitomize the day was Crowded House's 'Weather with you'. After endless courses of wonderful food, chatting, near hair urning on the table candles, the memorable and embarrassing speeches from Charlie, Steven and my thank yous everybody filtered back outside for some early evening relaxation and a chance to stroll around the gardens before the cake cutting and serious dancing. It was a balmy evening and chance for a few more photos. We were back in for the cutting of our epic cake and then hit the floor for our first dance. Maxwell's 'Wherever, whenever whatever. We were joined by other couples to Luther Vandross' 'Wherever the world ' and finished our trio of recorded songs with D'angelo's remixed 'Lady'. Then the band started and everyone had a good old boogy. Even my grandma and Tina were up dancing. We finished big an enormous group Zorba, it seemed that everyone had thoroughly enjoyed themselves. Jim Wright whisked us off to our first night hotel, Random Hall in Slinfold. On the journey I remember getting a bit of lock-jaw, I had been smiling so much all day. When we arrived we sank into the sofa in the lounge, exhausted, but very happy. Everything had gone so well. We shared some cheese and biscuits before retiring to our boudoir...
The following morning we enjoyed our breakfast outside on the patio before checking out. We decided to drive up to Newlands corner and flaked out on the grass. I suppose we didn't want the fairytale to end... Eventually we drove back to Worthing and our new home at Malthouse Cottages. The lounge was full of presents, but our new bed, which was a present from my nan hadn't arrived yet. We were due to fly to our honeymoon destination, Zante in Greece on the Tuesday, so we only had to spend one night on the mattress! That evening we opened a few presents, but left most for after the honeymoon.
Our honey moon destination of choice was Zakynthos or Zante in Italian, one of the Ionian islands. We wanted a classic beach holiday and had both been to Greece before. After pouring over holiday brochures and seeing the famous sandy Shipwreck beach of Navagio, booked a two-week holiday in a self-catering stone cottage. It was a direct flight from Gatwick to the capital Zakynthos town. After a short bus transfer we were at our very pretty old stone cottage, surronded by trees and plants. We stayed in the quiet resort of Vasilikos.
There followed the most amazing two weeks. We spent days on the beautiful sandy beaches and ate out most evenings at various tavernas. We hired bicycles to cycle a bit further and a car for three days so we could explore the island and see the famous shipwreck beach. We went on a boat trip round the island and even took the ferry to the mainland to visit the ancient city of Olympia, sight of the original Olympic games. It was a perfect honeymoon and the only problem was that it had to finish.
Chapter 19
Malthouse Cottages
And so there we were, a married couple. A journey that had begun some 15 years ago when I saw a beautiful 13 year old girl and been enchanted. I dreamt, we became friends, she went away, came back and now we were together.
Our first year of marriage went by in a blur. Malthouse cottage was a great first house, we loved it there. We furnished it with mostly second hand furniure. Her green sofa, a pine table and chairs, green curtains and eventually all the Wedding presents we eventually opened. When you invite 170 people to a wedding you get a lot of presents. Some were great, like the bed from my nan, the cutlery from Annette's mum and dad and Phil's saucepans. A Mexican fruitbowl from Max and Jacqui Warden, Lisa's vase, Dean's queen chess piece pepper mill which we still have today. Others which we enjoyed, but eventually broke. Some were weird like my mum's fisherman's cottage lamp and some forgettable... that I can't remember! We enjoyed the rest of the summer, ocassionally having brunch outside in our front garden. We changed congregations, as Goring was part of the 'Durrington' territory. We were in the book study group at Dick and Valerie Simon's house and I was reunited with Ian Lobb as conductor. We still did the Italian ministry once a month. Annette managed to find work in Worthing, moving from a school in Hove to Swandean school in Stoke Abbot road and I continued with the windows. I had my round and Joe gave me some of his houses up in Guilford. I was still doing the basketball coaching in the afternoons too. We invited family round for dinners and really enjoyed our time here.
As Autumn drew in we decided we would need some winter sun and so booked a holiday in Fuerteventura, one of the Canary islands. The beaches must have looked good in the brochures, but we didn't realise at the time that fuerta was Spanish for strong and ventura meant wind, strong wind. It turned out to be the worst holiday I think we both had! We caught food poisoning from the dodgy buffet food at the hotel. It was too cold to swim at the hotel pool or in the sea. The island was like a desert, with nothing to see or do and we were happy to be home.
And so the new millenium was upon us. 1999 turned into 2000. The 'noughties'. There was no computer bug and the world didn't end. Well not quite... The 2000s will now be remembered historically as the most difficult post second world war decade, so far... The 2000 American election fix, Milosevic overthrown and trial, the twin towers bombing, Madrid train bombing, London bombing, the Iraq war, Afghanistan war, the Tsunami, Hurricane Katrina, rogue traders and to cap it all off, the largest economic and financial crisis since 1929's great depression. Technology was moving on. The internet was becoming more advanced and we had ou first email address - leeandannette@yahoo.com- set up by nephew Rory. Unfortunately the internet killed the way we listen to music like cds killed the soul of vinyl. People no longer bought records or cds, but downloaded files on the computer and saved them in folders. The physical became the virtual. Reality tv, like Big Brother, talent shows like the X-factor and Pop Idol took the place of real quality tv and bands. Pop became pap with Robbie Williams and Britney Spears leading the way. Hip hop went from cool to naf, with Eminem and bling. Some of the only shining lights for me were Alicia Keys, John Legend, Indie music, the continuation of Friends, How I met your mother and the TV drama, the Sopranos. Films were just as bad, with book to screen adaptations, such as Lord of the Rings and the Harry Potter series, marvel comic films and cartoons being the highest grossing and even the Oscar winners not that inspiring... Fashion was forgettable too with Uggs and crocs shoes, skinny jeans, Emo and Botox. Luckily Annette and I had other things on our minds as you will see and for me personally the 2000s were possibly my best decade yet.
In fact for us it was a new beginning. We had settled into our new life. It was comfortable and cosy in our cottage and we were still basking in our first year of marriage. However a chance meeting would set the wheels in motion and propel us onto an even newer beginning and completely change our world. We were doing our Italian book study one Tuesday evening when a couple walked in. He was Italian she was English. They turned out to be Janet and Aldo, a couple who had just got married and had cut short their honeymoon on Elba to visit her sick mother down the coast in Eastbourne. They had heard about our little group and decided to investigate. I was trying to conduct the group in very bad Italian, but we made their acquaintence and at some point told them of our dream to someday move to Italy. They were very enthusiastic as they lived in Florence and attended the English congregation there and were always on ther lookout for more help. They invited us to their house for a holiday which would be a reconissance mission too, to see if we liked it enough to consider making the move. We booked the holiday for the following June.
It was a rather sad start for my family though - my grandma and grandad had spent the New Year in Castellamare in Italy visiting family, but my grandad had been taken ill. On their return to England he was admitted to hospital with jaundice. His condition worsened and by the March he was moved up to a hospital near London, he had emphysema. This was caused by a lifetime of smoking. We went up to visit him and he looked terrible. He couldn't eat and found it difficult to drink, swallow and eventually breathe. He began to lose weight, it was a slow, painful end to a life that had been busy and vibrant. He eventually died on 9th April, Annette and my brother Alan's birthday, the funeral was very sad. I wrote the eulogy with grandma and read it out at the funeral service at English Martyrs. The wake appropriately was at Blacknest hall, the home of the now divorced Dr Anne Giddins and the scene of so many of my childhood memories with him. It was a big blow to the family. My grandad was such a central figure and reference point to us all. My grandma obviously went to pieces, they had been together for nearly 60 years and very close. She decided probably a bit too quickly to move house, maybe the memories at Normandy road were just too much for her...
It was the end of an era.
On a happier note we enjoyed a couple of concert appointments in the spring. First was with some friends at the Brighton centre to see ageing bluesman B. B. King. Considering his age and the fact that he couldn't really stand, but sat in a chair all evening, it was a pretty cool concert. He was bedecked with lots of jewels and I seem to remember him throwing out gold necklaces into the audience... I can't believe they were real gold though! The second concert was actually our third opera, Aida and was at the very swish Royal Albert hall. It was my third or fourth time here and we managed to get tickets high up in the gods. It was a spectacular performance in the round and wonderful evening. We were up in London again for a visit to Hampton Court and we checked out Andrea Mantegna’s incredible Triumph of the Caesars fresco cycle.
Chapter 20
A taste of the Future
And so June came and our date with the future was sealed, a holiday in Florence...
Our hosts for the two weeks lived in the ‘up-market’ area of Gavinana to the south east of the historic centre. It was only a 10 minute bus ride to the centre and while the front of their villa was on a narrow road that seemed to be very popular with noisy scooters, the rear backed on to some lovely nurseries and fields. They pretty much left us to our own devices as we could get about on our own, especially in the centre.
Florence
We got straight down to business, after settling in and getting a bearing of where we were, headed into Florence. We had read up on what there was to see and do and discover that the historic centre of Florence was declared a UNESCO World Heritage site in 1982 and the sheer number of important buildings and works of art, meant in two weeks we were only going to scratch the surface.
Florence is a city built on the glory of the Renaissance, the art movement that brought Europe out of the dark ages and into a re-birth. Taking the humanistic ideals of St. Francis of Assisi and putting them into tangibles, i.e. Architecture, Sculpture and Painting. Leonardo Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, Michelangelo's David and Brunelleschi's Cupola were all masterpieces created in Tuscany. These were the pinnacles of their field, but in Florence there is so much more. We strolled around soaking up the history of this place. The narrow alleyways hold mysteries and secrets...
A Return To The Past
It had an air of secrecy
as I searched out its true spirit from a labrynth of decorative corridors,
a thousand mystical stories seemed locked within it's dusty exteriors.
A kind of vacant expectancy lay like a spell,
over once triumphant statues and rich colourful frescoes,
mute to inquisitive visitors.
Cupolas and bell towers rose majestically,
sentinels of the past,
aching to peer into sumptuous rooms,
filled with rich tapestries
of loving families, long gone.
Hidden churches crafted after ancient temples,
now dormant husks.
Thier creators no longer seeking to unravel ponderous equasions
or calculate endless orders and standards of antiquity,
the conquering and mastering of forgotten ways.
Spacious Piazzas opened themselves up like gaping holes,
bringing momentary refrain from narrow passages of suspicious memories.
I heard the sound of fires, floods and the smell of blood
of those who dared to speak out and challenge her grandeur.
And so swiftly I sought escape by way of an enclosed bridge,
traversing river and finding safety on a lofty hill.
I returned my gaze upon that city, scanning rooftops of burnished terracotta,
breathless and overwhelmed
at the magical charm
that had captured my soul.
(written on my return from Florence 2000)
We gasped at the enormous edifice that is the white, pink and green marble Duomo with Brunelleschi's terracotta cupola, complimented by Giotto's bell tower and the baptistery with Ghiberti's bronze doors or 'Gates of Paradise' as Michelangelo christened them. Then on to Piazza Signoria, which is more like an open sculpture museum and was breathtaking, I counted something like 20 sculptures there! All crowned by the imposing Palazzo Vecchio. We made our way to Piazza Santa Croce, another impressive square. I had to go inside and check out the the tomb of Michelangelo. Outside there was a huge statue of Dante, another of Florence's famous sons, who for political reasons was banished from the city.
We made a few bookings to check out some of this famous art, at the Uffizi, the Galleria Academia, where the original David sculpture is and the Bargello, which is the main sculpture museum.
To get a bird’s eye view of the city and as it was a beautiful sunny day, we decided to climb the 414 steps of the bell tower. Exhausting, but well worth the effort, especially on a day as clear as that. Even though it's called Giotto's bell tower, the early Renaissance artist only designed the first level.... However the views are spectacular! You can see down onto the terracotta roof tiles and out towards the hills.
Florence is actually situated in a valley and surrounded by huge hills and mountains. Fiesole to the east, Mt. Morello to the north and the Chianti hills to the south. I liked the fact that even though you're in a city, you are surrounded by the countryside. You can also get a bird's-eye-view of Brunelleschi's magisterial terracotta cupola.
In the evening we stumbled across an outdoor classical concert in a pretty loggia, the Mercato Nuovo I believe.
The Uffizi
We were advised to pre-book for Florence's most famous art gallery and so here we were, inside, having skipped the queues! The gallery was on the 1st floor, which seems more like the fifth! And it kind of snakes round in a u-shape, meaning you start at one end and finish at the other, sounds neat!
The Uffizi is the World's oldest public owned Museum, designed and started by Giorgio Vasari in 1560 it was completed in 1581 by Alfonso Parigi and Bernardo Buontalenti. It was constructed for the Granduke Francisco de Medici son of Cosimo I originally as offices for the Florentine Magistrates, hence the name 'Offices' or 'Uffizi'. Over the preceding years the building evolved into a display place for the many paintings and sculptures collected by the prolific Medici family. Interestingly over the years because of the sheer size of the collection, many sculptures were moved to the Bargello sculpture museum and the Fra Angelico paintings to the San Marco church. Still thousands of paintings remain locked in the basement, due to lack of floor space.
The collection starts sometime after the middle ages around 1200 with masterpieces by Cimabue, Giotto, Masaccio and continuing with Filippo Lippi, Botticelli and the mesmerising birth of Venus and Spring. There's the Michelangelo Doni Tondo, Leonardo's Annunciation (my personal favourite), Adoration of the Magi and Baptism of Jesus. Titian's Venus and Caravaggio's Bacchus. Two notable absences are Caravaggio's Medusa and Raphael's Madonna of the Chaffinch, both being restored. Piero della Francesca's Duke of Urbino, with the big nose is cool and the octagonal tribune, with the famous angel playing a mandolin by Rosso Fiorentino and a statue of Venus thought to be an original by the great Greek sculptor Praxiteles.
There is a cafe halfway round and very welcomed it was too... giving our feet a rest and our brain a rest from all this beauty! The Uffizi is an incredible testament to the quality and originality of the Renaissance. By now we have a spot of 'Stendhal syndrome' and must go home and lie down...
Siena
Our first foray out of the city was south to Siena. Siena we discover is the sworn arch enemy of Florence. That doesn't seem very nice? I don't recall the people of Worthing having any particular malice for people from Lancing or Brighton? No! No! our host tells us, we are in Italy! To begin to understand the Italian people we have to remember that the history of Italy as a united country goes back only 140 years to 1861. Before that time Italy was a country of individual sovereign states, a bit like San Marino and the Vatican state are today. Each city built towers and huge, thick walls to protect themselves not only from French, Spanish and Austro-Hungarian invaders, but also from neighbouring cities. Hence the reason why some residents of Florence are not so keen on their Siena or Pisa cousins! It's a hatred that goes back more than 500 years. Some Florentines will refuse to step foot in the centre of Siena, it really is that strange... for an English person anyway!
We've heard that Siena is quite pretty, so we went to investigate... We had to take a coach there, which we picked up near the station in Florence Santa Maria Novella. The drive was very pleasant and took us through some very pretty Tuscan countryside, rolling hills, tall cypress trees and small stone farmhouses dotted about. The countryside in Italy we learn, is protected by the government from building developers. Apparently it is very complicated to get any kind of building planning permission approved, even if you want to put a new window in! Still it keeps the countryside looking beautiful...
We arrived in Siena after about an hour and headed straight into the centre by way of San Domenico. The buildings are all made of these burnt Siena coloured bricks, which are quite dark, but on a gorgeous sunny day are warm and inviting. Siena is built on a large hill and the narrow streets go in concentric circles from the outside to the centre. We made our way to the very impressive white marble Cathedral which has a wonderful Romanesque facade with lots of interesting gargoyles and statues. There was a huge bell tower, a baptistery and lots of white marble steps. We didn't have time to go inside, but pressed on to Siena's 'piece de resistance'... the Piazza del Campo. It was a huge shell shaped square, if that makes sense. With the half brick half white marble town hall and bell tower, which appeared to be touching the sky! Around the edge there are restaurants and cafes and in the middle people had spread themselves out sitting on the dark brown stones, chilling out chatting, picnicking and just generally appearing to be having a great time! We joined them and soaked up the atmosphere of this magical square...
Our time was up for the day as we had a coach to catch, but this was definitely somewhere I wouldn't mind returning to... especially if I only lived 40 miles away!
The Galleria Accademia
One of the reasons I was drawn to Florence is it's the birthplace of someone who had become my favourite artist, Michelangelo. During the 10 years that I first visited Florence, I had read up loads on the guy and came to know about as much as one can about his works without actually seeing them! So obviously I was very excited to be actually coming face to face with one of my heroes and what better place to start than at the Galleria Accademia.
I was very excited as the original statue of David was housed here, along with four of the unfinished prisoners that were destined for the Julius II tomb in Rome, (the other two, 'Rebellious' and 'Dying' being in the Louvre in Paris). There is also a statue of St Matthew by Michelangelo and a Pieta, although experts now doubt its authenticity.
The Accademia di belle Arte was first founded in 1563 and Michelangelo's David, originally on the steps of the Palazzo Vecchio was brought here in 1873 to protect it from the elements and a copy put in its place.
It took the then 26 year old Michelangelo 3 years to create and from a block of marble that had been badly damaged! He carved it in over-sized proportions as it was to go on a high pedestal in the Duomo and therefore you are meant to look up to it. Again we had pre-paid tickets and so got straight in... One corridor and there he was! All seventeen feet of him, the David really is an immense statue, although the carving on it is quite incredible. You can see the veins on his hands and the Carrara marble is almost translucent. We stood there open mouthed gazing at this incredible work of art...
The four prisoners were pretty cool too, all in various stages of realization. Atlas, The Bearded Slave, The Young Slave and The Awakening Slave. Michelangelo said that he didn’t sculpt figures into marble, he liberated them out of it. He quarried his own marble in Carrara to the north west of Florence, seeing the figures in the living rock before driving in the first nail that would split it off the rock face. The unfinished slaves are deeply compelling examples of how Michelangelo chipped away the marble enclosure, gradually exposing more and more the sculpture trapped inside.
San Gimignano
The next day we had a date with somewhere I remember reading about in a book... I've no idea of the title, but I remember the author visiting this charming medieval town and his little son having trouble saying the name! They settled on 'Jimmy Jimmy', after that famous English football pundit with the strange beard, Jimmy Hill! The town as it turned out was San Gimignano... which has that classic Italian 'gn' which is pronounced 'ny' in English.
Anyhow, we were again on the coach from Florence as we were told, yes, San Gimignano is a delightful place... as it turns out, this proves to be our favourite excursion from Florence. We just wandered aimlessly and there seemed to be something amazing around every corner. A spectacular view, a tower and all buildings carved out of the most wonderful honey coloured stone. It was a boiling hot June afternoon and we could hear the strains of a distant harp. We followed the sound and ended up in a tiny square where a blind harpist was strumming away and a few people had gathered to listen.
The 'Torre Grande' was calling and we climbed up inside for some even more incredible views of the surrounding countryside.
I think it was probably about now that we both looked at each other and said, "Ok, so when can we move here?"
The Bargello
This is the art gallery that is dedicated solely to sculpture. One of the oldest buildings in Florence, it was built in 1260 to house the Magistrate of the Florentine council or 'Podesta'. When the Medici did away with the 'Podesta' the Bargello became a prison and executions took place in the courtyard. It became a National Museum in 1865 and the Palace was enriched by some of the most important Renaissance sculptures including masterpieces by Luca della Robbia, Verrocchio, Donatello, Michelangelo and Cellini. There are some special pieces in here that I just cannot miss...
For starters there is one of Michelangelo's earliest sculptures, Bacchus, created when he was only 22 years old. The marble has been smoothed out and depicts the young Roman god of wine, with grapes for hair, tipping his cup lasciviously in a state of inebriation, wonderful! Bacchus is depicted with rolling eyes, his staggering body almost teetering off the rocky outcrop on which he stands. Sitting behind him is a faun, who eats the bunch of grapes slipping out of his left hand. The figure, with its swollen breast and abdomen, suggested to Giorgio Vasari "both the slenderness of a young man and the fleshiness and roundness of a woman", and its androgynous quality has often been noted.
There are also two older 'Davids' one by Verrocchio and the other by Donatello. Also a very famous sculpture from the Mannerist period, is Giambologna's 'Mercury'
The gallery also features the competing designs on Isaac's Sacrifice, that were performed by Lorenzo Ghiberti and Filippo Brunelleschi to win the contest for the second set of doors of the Florentine Baptistry.
The Bargello is somewhere that usually gets overlooked by visitors to Florence as there simply isn't time to see everything on a day trip, a weekend or even in a week. In fact many art students will come to Florence for six months or a year to study the embarrassment of riches that this relatively modest sized city holds. Even in our two week trip there are so many other treasures that we were going to miss the only sensible thing to do would be to move here!
Boboli Gardens
After seeing so many buildings and museums we had to check out some green areas which in Florence are few and far between. If we were to move here, I think it wouldn't be in the historic centre, but somewhere in the surrounding countryside, which we agreed is very beautiful. The most well known green space in Florence is Boboli Gardens, which is actually part of the Pitti Palace, one time home of the Medici and King of Italy, when Florence was briefly the capital of Italy.
The gardens are extensive and set out in the very formal Italian style with lots of close cropped hedges, statues, fountains, pathways and well not much grass! We picked a scorchingly hot day to come here, it was just too hot to enjoy fully, however there were some great views over the city.
Lucca
Now this was somewhere that was a very nice surprise. Before I came to Tuscany I'd never heard of Lucca, a small city near Pisa. One thing that makes it unique is that unlike many old Italian cities the original city walls remain.
We took the train to Lucca and entered through one of the many gates, through the very thick walls. Infact the walls are so thick you can walk on them, which we did. Many people seemed to be riding bicycles along the walls, apparently there are many bicycle shops, where you can hire them.
The city itself was very elegant and there were very few tourists here. We spent a very enjoyable afternoon strolling round this very pretty place, there are many interesting churches and towers. If we moved to Florence, Lucca would be one of our neighbouring towns and definitely worth further exploration.
Greve-in-Chianti
One trip that are hosts accompanied us on was here to Greve. Greve is one of the first towns you come to in the area known as Chianti. Now I knew Chianti was a type of wine, but now discover that it is a whole area, a bit like Burgundy in France, or the Napa Valley in California.
Aldo drove us out to this tiny town on a road called the Chiantigiana and I have to say it is one of the most stunning roads I'd ever been on. Rolling hills, tall cypress trees, rows of neatly trimmed vines and silvery green olive groves everywhere. Greve itself is a very picturesque town with an old colonnaded square that is more triangular in shape. We stopped for an ice-cream and soaked up the atmosphere. A very pleasant trip.
Pisa
Of course no trip to Tuscany would be complete without a trip to Pisa and a look at the famous leaning tower. Again an hour train journey from Florence. To find the tower you have to go on a short walk to the 'Campo dei Miracoli', this is an incredible complex, a symphony of white marble! Including the leaning bell tower, the Cathedral, the baptistry and mausoleum. Unfortunately at that time you couldn't go up the tower as it was having strengthening work done on it, with a series of steel cables attached, insuring that it doesn't fall over!
Still you can still take the obligatory silly photo of yourself trying to prop it up and admire the sublime craftsmanship, albeit with the dodgy foundations. I wonder if it would be as famous if it weren't leaning? Well it's still pretty impressive.
Apart from this very impressive square, there didn't seem to be much else to see in Pisa... I'm sure another visit here would prove me wrong.
San Giovanni
We somehow managed to time our holiday to co-incide with Florence's patron saint's day San Giovanni, we kind of stumbled upon it really and it proved to be the icing on the cake for us. San Giovanni is the most important day of the year for Florentines and everybody goes all out to make it a spectacle. In Piazza Santa Croce there is an historic football match and the square is transformed with sand and bleachers round the edge. We installed ourselves in Piazza Signoria, which is crammed full of people and enjoy the costumed parade. There are horses and even white bulls being paraded and some very elaborate costumes, including the four football teams who will be playing for top honours later. We stay in town for a meal and at ten o'clock it appears the whole city has come out to witness an incredible firework display from Piazza Michelangelo above the city. The fireworks are being reflected over the river Arno for a truly wondrous experience.
A very fitting end to two magical weeks in Tuscany. Obviously on a holiday you do get to see the best of everything, but what's not to love about this place? We returned to a dismal, grey, wet England, vowing to do all we could to make the move to Tuscany a reality...
Chapter 21
Goodbye England
'Beauty awakens the soul to act' - Dante
2001
The beginning of the year saw some major technical changes as Apple introduced I-tunes, a digital catalogue for downloading music via the internet and later on in the year their first I-pod, a device for listening to digital music, The Wikepedia website was also launched. Both media would change the way we buy music and search for information. The days of the music shop and library were all but numbered.
And so we began to plot our escape from England. The first thing I needed to do was decide what job I was going to do. That was kind of done for me. I was English we were going to be living in Italy, Italians want to learn to speak English, so I had to learn how to teach English to them. Enter the world of EFL, that English meal ticket that allows young English University graduates the chance to tavel the world before getting a proper job. Annette was an EFL teacher at Swandean. She had taught privately in Hong Kong before doing an intensive EFL teaching course in Worthing and passing with a very-hard-to-get A grade. Even though she worked full time in England it was quite hard to get a permanent contract here as it was mainly popular abroad. So at the beginning of 2001 I enrolled in a course at Northbrook college on the Littlehampton road. I wasn't new to college, having recently done my Italian course and Autocad city and guilds. Annette was very helpful, reading my papers before submitting them. My teachers knew her well and although my natural charm (he says not trying to laugh) shone through, it was if we were doing it together. I passed easily and my tutors had no hesitation awarding me my coveted A grade.
In the Spring we went up to London for our last concert. American soul songstress, Macy Grey was performing up at the Brixton Academy and her support band were an up and coming American rap group called the Black eyed peas... the rest they say is history!
In May Silvio Berlusconi was elected President for the second time in Italy and would be in power when we made our move. In June the labour party won the general election in England and Tony Blair began his second term in power. Soon after at the G8 summit in Genoa, Italy the massive demonstrations saw an Italian civilian shot by police.
That summer we had a huge 'Blues' house party. We invited about 30 of our closest friends, bought in some finger food and drinks, I did a mix mini disc of bumping tunes and turned Malthouse into the Roxy nightclub. It went ok, although nobody really danced... and luckily the neighbours didn't complain...
As a back-up I had the opportunity to take my level 2 Basketball Coaching certificate in the spring. It meant I would be able to coach adults and teams. I jumped at the chance and passed my exam with flying colours. I worked crazy to get my window cleaning up to scratch and catalogued all my customers. The idea was to sell the round.
I advertised it and fortunately found a guy who lived on the Upper Brighton road. He turned out to be a witness, from the Lancing congregation. He agreed a price and I took him round all my customers to introduce him. I think the price we agreed was around £2,000, which would give me some money in the bank to start off in Italy, while we found a place to live and work. I included my green Vauxhall Cavalier and ladders. He gave me a cheque for half the amount and another cheque which I cashed a week later.
We had decided to move in the November. I'm not sure why, but we were to drive half way and stop for a week's holiday with Ruth and Joe in the Lot in France. Joe had been offered this country house and barn by one of his customers for a holiday in exchange for a painting. At the end of July our two year contract was up on Malthouse cottage and we decided to stay with Annette's parents until we were due to leave in mid October. They were getting a new car and offered us their 12 year old Nissan Sunny. It still had plenty of life left in it and we duly accepted.
On the 11th September I was window cleaning up in Guilford, when I saw through a customer's window the tv on and a smoking building. She invited me in to watch and we saw New York's twin towers World Trade Centre topple to the ground... 9 years ago I had stood 100 floors up on the viewing deck and now they were a pile of rubble on the ground.
That day the world changed.
One month later Annette and I drove to Italy for a new life.
Our world had changed too...
End of Part 2
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